Having someone to admire is a sure rollercoaster of feelings and emotions. Despite us hoping and praying for a smooth and effective way of gaining our crush’s favor, sometimes the ride is not always that smooth.
Grab a snack as we dive into some comedic yet relatable tales of romantic misadventures, where people failed to impress their interests in devastatingly embarrassing ways. Check them out!
1. On Point
In my senior year of high school, I told one of my best friends, who was also this sweet, beautiful, very in shape, football-playing boy, to throw the football as high as he possibly could and that I would catch it.
You know, to impress him and make him realize I was the girl of his dreams. He threw it. High. I did not catch it. I fractured my pointer finger when it bounced off my hands.
Had to wear a friggin’ finger cast to school for a few weeks and go to physical therapy for my finger. He felt terrible. I felt like an idiot.
He did buy me “I’m sorry” flowers, though. So, that was nice. People at school thought my finger brace was hilarious. Since I was constantly walking around giving a “number 1” hand gesture due to the brace, everyone at school started giving me the “number 1!” gesture when I walked by them. Good times.
BRKS4
2. Not Too Obvious
This past year, I threw a fairly large college house party just so the guy I liked could attend. I didn't want to show him too much favoritism, so I tried to run around and talk to everyone as I was the main host.
Luckily, my best friend kept him company and acted as my faithful wingwoman. The night ended with my crush and me talking outside, getting closer and closer until he asked me if I had thrown the party for him.
Even being drunk didn't soften the blow of straight awkwardness. I tried to laugh it off and deflect, but I'm a terrible actor.
Looking back, it was kind of obvious that the entire party was an excuse to see him, and I now understand why I liked reading The Great Gatsby so much in high school.
vitriolistt
3. Destroyed Dignity
I was dating a gymnast in high school. We go to a park, and I see parallel bars that are designed for stretching, but I'm convinced I can do a handstand on them because I'm awesome.
She keeps insisting they are too far apart, but I don't listen. Attempt said handstand. They were indeed too far apart, so I collapsed down.
It led to jamming my chest past my hands and straining/tearing all the ligaments holding my chest muscles to my chest bone. Good times were not had later or for a long while after.
Mostlyamoron
4. Worst Miss
Took my friend to the driving range, and she asked if her insanely hot friend could come as well. The friend mentioned she's never hit a golf ball before, so I'm thinking of a jackpot.
I've got a way of talking to this girl and an excuse to ask her back out on one if that goes well.
Get to the range. Hit a couple of warm-up shots while she's getting her clubs rented, and she takes the spot next to me.
Decided really crush this ball to impress her and give the swing everything I've got. I missed the ball, clipped the ground, and broke the club right off the pole. It proceeds to bounce back, smack me in the face, and give me a solid shine, all while she's watching.
[deleted]
5. Fighting The Storm
My first serious girlfriend is home alone. It's mid-summer, and I know I can bike the 3 miles pretty quickly. I tell my parents I'm going to see my friend right around the block, and they warn me that a thunderstorm is rolling in. I tell them it takes no time to get there.
Ten minutes later, I'm only halfway there, terrified, crying, and peddling as hard as I can to go downhill against the wind.
My all-metal framed BMX knock-off was huffy, doing its best not to get hit with lightning and fuse me to its shiny silver exterior forever.
30+ MINUTES AFTER THAT, I pull into her garage and thank god that all the rain has hidden the fact I've been ugly sobbing the entire way.
Her parents then pull in as I'm literally hunched over, trying to catch my breath. I told them this was the only house I knew on the street, and it would have been life-threatening to bike the rest of the way home in this storm.
They smiled, probably knowing it was a lie, and treated me to a nice dinner. It ends with a very awkward drive home with her father, my bike in the back of his truck.
WickedZombie
6. Zero Visibility
When I was a senior in high school, I was giving this girl a ride home in a bad storm. I told her everything was okay, but my windshield wipers didn’t work.
Then, we heard an emergency broadcast on the radio that a tornado had touched down not a mile away from us. I stopped under a bridge and let her cry while I put on my brave face.
I was so scared. That was the second time I had gone through a tornado situation. We literally couldn’t see anything at all through my windows because the rain was coming down so hard. My car started moving because of the wind. It was the scariest experience of my life.
JordanLCheek
7. A Special Gift
I hoarded a bunch of stuffed animals I won at a local arcade over the summer for this girl I really liked. One night, I thought, you know, tonight’s the night.
I’m going to surprise my crush with all these stuffed animals, and she’s going to fall in love with me. So, I threw them in a white garbage bag, walked two miles down the road to her house during sunset, and knocked on her door.
She answered the door while I concealed the bag of goodies behind my back. She awkwardly asked what I was doing at her house, and I revealed the surprise.
She slowly grabbed the bag from me, looked inside it, and gave me an awkward thanks while closing the door. Right then and there, I realized I had miscalculated the gesture and probably looked like a huge creepy freak.
I power-walked back home, and to this day, I still think about it from time to time. I think it’s my brain’s way of punishing me eternally for putting it through that whole thing.
_Than0s
8. Blinded by Admiration
My sister was driving me back to college after Thanksgiving break, and this cool girl drove a yellow Jeep Wrangler with whom I had some classes.
On the road, getting closer to the school, I saw a yellow Jeep approaching us in the left lane. Of course, I thought, it had to be her! I was in the passenger seat and decided it would be a great idea to open the sunroof, stick my head out, and say hello.
Mind you, we're going about 60mph, and I wear glasses. I opened the sunroof, stuck my head out, turned to face the upcoming car, and my glasses FLEW off my face.
I am practically blind without them. I yelled at my sister to pull over, and we spent the next 30 minutes wandering around the side of the highway (blind) to try and find my frames.
They got pretty smashed up, but luckily, the lenses weren't too scratched. I got some duct tape and a pair of sunglasses at a gas station and rigged up the monstrosities I wore on my face for the rest of that semester. To this day, I still don't know if it was her driving that Jeep.
stolenbaby
9. Took It Too Far
I sat next to a girl I really liked in high school, a calc. She would get upset because I’d get As on tests, and she kept getting Cs.
She cared a lot about grades, so I tried to be comforting, saying it was a hard class, I had a lot of lucky guesses, etc. She was having none of it.
So, I decided to get a C on purpose on the next test. We got them back, and I was excited to show her, but she got hers back and failed. Like below 50% failed. She wasn’t impressed with my C, and neither were my parents.
cgsdawgs
10. Wrong Move
I was alone in a park in front of my house. I was standing by the monkey bars, just fooling around; I was around ten at the time.
I see a group of around five girls cycling towards me, all about 16 years old. Thinking I could impress them, I jumped on the monkey bar, still looking at them to show off.
I missed the bars and fell from a 6 ft wooden playground flat on the face. Teeth through my lip, crying and everything. Oops.
They ran over, asked me where I lived, and carried me home. They were really sweet about it, but it was pretty embarrassing for me.
Kingpowner
11. The Swimmer
I was in New Zealand going to a beach party with some girls from the hostel where I was staying. To get to the party, you needed to take a $2 ferry across this inlet, which was about 1km wide.
I decided to swim it to impress the ladies. About halfway through, I realize that I'm slowly being swept out to sea and losing strength.
I'm not sure how, but I eventually made it to the other shore, about 100 meters from the pier. The ferry had docked about 2-3 minutes before me.
I just nonchalantly walked over to meet the girls, as if I hadn't swum against a current to near exhaustion and was swept out to sea. The $2 was for a round trip, and I still had to pay $2 to get back once the party was over.
beerbellybegone
12. Acapella Dance
I was abroad in the Dominican Republic. They had a dance competition on stage; anyone could enter, and around 200 people were watching.
I was about 9-10 and spotted a cute girl who must've been around 14-15... So, obviously, I decided the best way to get her attention was to get up on stage and dance my heart out.
Queue 3 minutes of awkward shuffling while maintaining constant eye contact with that girl and horrified/queasy looks from my parents. The coordinator cut me off early by pretending the speaker stopped working. I got a pity clap.
SlothWithATopHat
13. The Strong Man
On a 4th of July date, after going out to dinner, I took her out on the lake in a canoe to watch the fireworks. It was awesome.
Young macho me turned down her offer of help with a large canoe, and I manhandled that thing like it was nothing. Put her in it while it was on the grass and continued manhandling it to show off just how strong I was.
The next morning, I had to call in to work sick because my back muscles were so strained I couldn't get out of bed. My back was sore for over a week!
The_Superfist
14. No Guitar, Mister
I was 14, totally and fully in love with this girl from my class. Gotta add we kinda flirted for a whole year but got nowhere.
She was the kind of girl who likes attention, so you can imagine how she kept me hooked up, knowing I had no chance... Since it was getting close to Valentine's Day, I decided I was going to impress her and make her mine by learning how to play guitar and all her favorite songs!
I spent a whole week practicing like a madman and learned two songs I knew she loved. So fully prepared and convinced I'd hit the jackpot, on the 14th, I went to her house and called her out, telling her I had a surprise.
She pops her head out of the door, sees me and my guitar, and nopes out of there, telling me to leave. Hey, at least I now know how to play the guitar!
Martels
15. Quick Rejection
In my sophomore year of HS, I asked a girl out on Valentine's Day by having red, pink, and white carnations delivered to her homeroom.
I walked by her homeroom, and my buddy gave me a negative headshake. Already disappointed, she came out, told me she had a boyfriend, and asked me if I understood.
She kept repeating, "Do you understand?" repeatedly. In retrospect, I probably had the "deer in headlights" look on my face.
The worst part was that I was pretty confident about her saying yes and had told all my friends about it. The train ride home that afternoon was pure hell as my friends razzed me non-stop for the entire ride.
In my defense, she had invited me to her birthday party a few weeks before, and her boyfriend wasn't there, and he wasn't brought up at all. So...yeah. To say I was gun-shy after that would be a major understatement.
[deleted]
16. Big Announcement
In elementary school, I liked this girl, and I saw her touching her nose, and I shouted: "EW YOU'RE PICKING YOUR NOSE!" So people could hear.
Twenty years later, and we're married with two kids - nah, just kidding, we say "hi" sometimes when we pass each other on the street.
Anyways, you're probably wondering how this was supposed to impress her. Well, my dumb tactic was that by embarrassing her, she would think I was cooler than she was.
Anything embarrassing I would do would be excused because she got caught picking her nose. I know... In hindsight, I was just an irrational meanie.
robotostrich
17. Bugged Minded
When I was about eight years old, we took a field trip to the Field Museum in Chicago. During our lunch break, I decided to wander off to the gift shop and see what they had.
I had a huge crush on this girl named Victoria in my class, and I saw this ladybug ring for a couple of dollars. I knew she liked ladybugs and I had money my parents gave me to buy something at the shop, so I decided to buy the ring and give it to her.
I was really nervous and kept waiting for the right time to do it. I eventually decided to just go for it and walked up to her near the end of the trip.
She was with some of her friends, which made me more nervous, but I found the courage to do it. She looked at the ring and laughed. Her friends joined her, and she tossed the ring in the trash.
I was completely devastated and tried hard to hold back my tears. Even though I'm over it now, that completely messed up my confidence with girls for a long time.
Looking back, I may have embarrassed her too, giving it to her in front of her friends, which is why she reacted that way, but whatever the case, it's probably the most embarrassing I have been in my life.
-eDgAR-
18. Risky Question
I was 15 and had a huge crush on this one girl who flirted with me on the bus from time to time but never said yes to a date.
I finally walked up to her bus stop and shouted at the top of my lungs, "HOW HIGH?!" She looked at me amongst the others and said, "What?" so I repeated, "How high do I have to climb this telephone pole before you say yes to a date?" She said the top.
Didn't end as badly as people might expect, with a hormone-crazed 15-year-old climbing the top of an active telephone pole. She stopped me before I got to the wires and said yes out of fear. Ripped my shirt.
We went out on a date - mini golf, with some of her friends. Got a kiss at the end of it. Never went on another one because she was just a general jerk.
mythanksdotgif
19. Different Activity
Three years ago, I went snowboarding with this fine lady. She has grown up skiing heavily throughout every winter. I was able to go maybe 1 to 3 times a winter since childhood, so I am decent, I would say.
She clearly has the upper hand on the slopes, while I may have done some boasting of my skills prior to the trip. I decided to hit a jump to show her some of the skills that I talked about.
I have been surfing my whole life and can say, in that instance, the air I got off that snowy jump was nothing like what my mind led me to believe it'd be like compared to getting air off of a wave.
I lost my balance and landed on my wrist. It breaks, obviously. I think it's just sprained, so we go get a bite to eat, and I take a few shots to numb the pain and continue hitting the slopes for a few hours.
But as a broken wrist would have, the pain was pretty good. Come to find out later. It is broken badly and needs a few screws and a plate on my wrist. Still with said lady, I took the L but walked away with the win.
Drewcrew12
20. The Flying Kid
Here’s a little back story...there was this girl I liked, and we talked a lot, kind of sorta....she gave off a vibe like she liked me but did the same with other boys, too...so here and on of my friends was having a conversation.
It was a fun day or a free day, so everyone was just hanging out with their friends and such. So anyway I saw them, and she was laughing at a joke he told her.
So, in my mind, I thought I would look cool jumping down the stairs and landing on my feet. Thinking, “Maybe she’ll think I’m some athletic freakazoid.”
I took a good running start and ran straight between them so she would have no choice but to look. I leaped as far as I could. I felt so majestic and graceful, but it was very short-lived.
I felt the ground put an abrupt stop to my gracefulness. I knocked the wind out of myself but still managed to stay on my feet.
I literally could not breathe. I thought I was dying. I couldn’t stand up straight without feeling any pain. I looked up and saw her looking at me.
So, with everything in me, I stood up straight and walked until I was out of view. Then, I instantly stooped over again and made my way toward my class.
All my friends who passed were asking me if I was okay. I was clutching my stomach and chest. I made my way back to my class and collapsed on the floor until I recovered and coughed up some blood, too.
Jae242
21. Date Preparation
I met a girl through a friend at a party. She seemed very down-to-earth and chilled, too. After dancing a few songs, I asked for her number, and she gave it to me because "I seemed cool," she said.
After a couple of weeks of texting, I decided to ask her out on a date, and she agreed. I should note that my previous relationship left me devastated, and I was a bit desperate to find someone else.
I set up this nice dinner at my house. I'm talking home-cooked meal, a nice dinner table surrounded by candles (from the door to the dining room, I had a "path" of candles, nice romantic music playing in the background, and an NBA 2k13 game paused, ready to be played (she had told me she was into it).
Well, she saw it as desperation. She said it was too much for a first date. I have to agree; it was a bit much for a first date, but I just wanted to show her that side of me. I didn't mean to be a weirdo.
RG198
22. The Poet
Freshman year in High School. Had a crush on a classmate (we'll call him "L") who seemed like he liked me too, but he was popular, so you never know if it's just them doing the whole smooth, friends-with-everyone yet borderline flirting kind of act.
So, I decided to profess my love via a poem. I thought it would impress him to show my mad rhyming skills and my absolute adoration for alliteration. (Hah).
Go to L's locker during a restroom break, shove that four-page thick bad boy in those tiny little windows of ventilation, and then after the bell rings, giggle and hide with my girlfriends as we watch from afar, waiting for him to go to his locker so my shower of love could befall upon him.
Whelp. Turns out I stuffed it into the wrong locker - (let's call him "J") - A kid I generally did not get along with. J is at first shocked and confused that his enemy wrote him a poem because I couldn't keep it anonymous and play it cool- nope.
No sir. I had to write "Poem Written with Love by Kismet" as the freakin title. Then J realized that I did not mean for these love notes to be for him and quickly started calling out for the entire freshman year to come over.
I start to rush over with every intention of shutting him up. But my friends hold me back, till this day- I still have no idea why they stopped me.
Anyway, J started reading out my poems, and L was even there to listen to them. And at the end, there was even a declaration to L, of sorts, where IIRC, I basically asked L if he would be my boyfriend.
Laughter, pitiful looks, the whole ordeal. I was mortified. L was never friendly with me again and never let me explain or apologize for "humiliating him."
The bright side, though, is that people forgot about it by my sophomore year. I still had a lot of friends, and my English teachers heard about it and thought I had talent, so I pursued a writing major after that! Oh! And I beat up J in the handball court after school about a week later haha.
KismetHeartfilia
23. Forecasting Outfit
I'm not so impressed, but this kid I liked as a sophomore in high school would wear the same five outfits every week.
Every day when we were in the fourth period, I would write down in a notebook what he was wearing and what day it was. I gathered data for around two months.
When I felt like I had gathered enough, I started to analyze the trends of which day he wore what. I found out what he wore every day of the week and matched up my outfits to the trends that I wrote down so it looked like we ‘unintentionally’ matched Every. Single. Day.
I even searched for the exact stuff he was wearing and bought the feminized version of it. I told him about it a year later when we were juniors because it weighed down on me how weird that was, and now we avoid each other as much as possible, but it’s hard to because we play in the same orchestra.
BrauneHund
24. A Crazy Day
I was in 3rd grade, and I wanted to impress these girls who were good friends of mine because I was always known for "being really funny."
So naturally, I wanted to please and entertain. I found the school bully and his best friend. My terribly stupid idea started when I screamed, "You're a big dummy!"
Next thing, he stormed off, and a group of kids grabbed me by my arms before dragging and leading me to the edge of the hill before throwing me down the biggest hill at our school while the school bully beat the crap out of me on the way down and while I was down.
They thought I was funny and were pissed at the dude. I got him suspended, lied, and said I was calling myself an idiot and that they misheard me and spent the rest of the day at home playing Halo 3.
MrEmuu
25. Freezing Point
I was at a friend's lake house on a lake in northern Maine, a short drive from the border with Canada, in late May. The water had been a sheet of ice a few weeks prior, but it was nice and warm up.
So, while we were out on the lake in a boat with his wife and my girlfriend, I decided to show off by swimming on a small island that was in the center of the lake and was surrounded by buoys marking where it was too shallow for boats.
It looked to be only a few hundred yards away, so I stripped to my shorts and dove into the water. I was a pretty strong swimmer then, but that water was the coldest thing I have ever encountered.
I got into my rhythm, but each time I came up for air, I was simply unable to breathe in beyond tiny little gasps. Gradually, worry and then panic came over me, and I began to fatigue far quicker than I would have expected.
In my mind, I started to worry that if I made it to the island, I would not be able to get back. So, I began to modify my expectations. Just wanted to make it to the buoy.
Then I gave up that goal and just stopped, turned around to call for help.....to see that my friends had sped away. They were gone. I was in the middle of this freezing lake, with nothing, exhausted and alone.
Full panic started then. Panic strength helped me get to the buoy, which I was able to cling to for a few minutes before they mercifully came back.
bassfunk
26. The Rude Kid
When I was in grade 5, I had a massive crush on this guy in my class. I was the typical weird girl, and he was one of the hockey boys who only hung out with the popular girls.
Anyway, on my birthday, I decided to tell him I had a crush on him. I was decently close friends with a boy he hung out with often, so I asked him what I should do ( I regret asking his opinion looking back now)
So, at lunch recess, we all go out to play in the snow, and I manage to corner and maintain my crush's attention long enough to tell him how I felt.
He pushed me, spilled on ice, fell face first, and broke my nose. It’s still a bit crooked to this day, but I’m pleased to say I got hot, and he looks like a mutant mole rat now.
herbalcocain
27. Soak Jump
Not me, but a friend while I was a teen. We were walking to a park to hang out, and the girl he liked was walking with us. He was having a blast.
He wanted to impress her by jumping over a ditch that was probably 4-5 feet deep with runoff water—the jump was about 6-7 feet.
My dude got a running start but actually landed directly in the center of the ditch, completely drenching himself in run-off water.
What does he do? He swims out and acts as if nothing happens, even though we’re all laughing. He continues his whole day soaked in dirty water and flirting with this girl. They eventually had a child together, so I guess it worked.
[deleted]
28. Spicy Date
I ate a very hot red pepper from the Thai restaurant. The girl I was trying to impress was eating them like it was nothing and told me I couldn't handle it.
Of course, I wanted to impress her by showing that even people like me can withstand these things. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
It wasn't. Now I'm laughing about it, but at the moment, I honestly thought I was going to die. It took the whole day to get out of my system.
I'm pretty sure I could feel it making its way through my body. It was burning everything it touched in its wake. Now, I impress girls by eating mild green peppers.
[deleted]
29. Driving Lesson
There was an attractive foreign exchange student from Spain at our school (in rural Iowa) that year, and I befriended her in an attempt to eventually get in touch with her.
After a couple of months of being her friend, we somehow got on the topic of how she's never driven a car but would love to try it out.
I should also let it be known that I befriended her because she was an interesting, fun person! We had similar personalities, and it just so happened that I was also attracted to her.
So, I thought, what could be the worst thing to happen if I let her drive around the parking lot a bit? I seemed to do fine my first time driving.
Well, it turns out she had no concept of gradual, slow, or even pressure on the pedal while you're starting off. She wrecked my car a few times by going pedal to the floor.
I totally had to pull the e-brake, and I decided it wasn't worth totaling my car and whoever else was parked in the lot that day.
dillonmp
30. The Emergency
I knew the girl. A guy was trying to impress her while she was skiing. He was on a jet skit and was jumping the wake behind her.
Of course, he screws up and ends up hitting her in the back with the jet ski. She goes to the hospital with super serious injuries.
She didn't know since she was out, but he felt terrible and basically lived in her hospital room. She eventually came to (not sure how many days she was out due to surgeries and stuff).
She was super nice and forgave the guy, especially because he had spent so much time in her room. Well, of course, they kept hanging out, and she was in total denial that the guy liked her, but eventually, they started dating, and they got engaged, and I believe they got married.
Shardless2
31. Highest Jump and Fall
I was playing basketball at lunch in high school when three girls walked by. I didn’t have the ball, so I couldn’t impress them with my dribbling skills. Instead,
I decided to jump and hang on the rim (cause that’s what the ladies like), but my fingers slipped off, and I fell 10’ onto my back, knocking the wind out of me.
The whole gym looked on in horror, yelling, “Dayummm.” I tried to laugh it off, but the contraction from laughing caused me to scream out in pain.
Two friends had to carry me off the court, help me change out of my shorts into pants, and drive me to the hospital. It was so freaking painful.
Ding_of_Bing
32. Who’s The Chicken
When I was maybe eight years old, I climbed on top of our backyard shed. The neighborhood girls were in the backyard playing when they came over and started to talk to me.
They then told me to jump off, or I was chicken. Well, I’m no chicken, so I said alright I’ll do it. I proceeded to jump off the shed, but my foot got caught in the gutter.
This caused me to fall head first. So when I fell, I stuck out my arms to brace the fall and broke my left arm pretty badly and had to be rushed to the ER. The moral of the story is at least I wasn’t a chicken.
lolElmoNation
33. Hopeless Romantic
I was hopelessly in love with probably the most beautiful girl I'd ever seen; she's Turkish, I'm English, and we met on a ski trip in France. Somehow, and I still don't know how I managed it, she started to really like me.
I went to visit her in Turkey, and after a few days, the novelty of dating an Englishman wore off. She grew increasingly distant, which made me even more lovestruck - I was just following her around like the hopeless idiot I was (and still am).
One night, at around 3 am, we were in bed, and she was fast asleep. In one last effort to make her fall in love with me, I thought it'd be a good idea to wake her up and show her how good I am at anagrams.
After about five minutes of her staring at me in half-awake confusion, it dawned on me: she spoke little English and didn't know what any of the words were.
She must have thought I'd woken her up at 3 am to give her a bizarre, impromptu English lesson. On reflection, that is probably less weird than reality. I returned to England the next day, and she never spoke to me again.
kingmakyeda
34. Born To Be A Singer
We had a foreign exchange student in my Freshman year of High school. She was French and absolutely gorgeous, so naturally, all of us boys were smitten with her.
She was in choir and sang really well, so I figured since I was a musician as well, that was my "in" with her. So, I learned a love song from a very popular French Opera.
It took me a really long time to memorize, and I thought it would be a bold gesture. So, I sang it to her flawlessly and asked her how she liked it.
I was thinking that making the effort to learn a love song in her language would be a great gesture. Well. That day, I found out that she was Swedish, not French. I'm freaking stupid.
[deleted]
35. Open Wound
Had a sick day from school due to a doctor's appointment when I was about 12 or so. I had just gotten a new BMX bike and wanted to show it off, so I decided to go to the school and meet up with one of my friends.
Told him to get on the back pegs as the entire school was being released. I saw the girl I had a crush on with a bunch of other girls.
For some reason, I thought it would be cool if I did a wheelie...with my friend on the back... It didn't work out so well as we both fell off the bike, and I ripped into my elbow so deep that the bone was showing.
The outcome was people either laughing their heads off or just running away in disgust from the injury. Needless to say, nah, it didn't work, lol.
adlerc85
36. Mystery Note
In 9th grade, I had a huge crush on a girl that was a year older than me. Valentine’s Day came around, and I wanted to make a romantic gesture.
I left a rose in her locker with a little love note attached to it. The day came and went, and I received no inclination that she was interested.
So, embarrassed and defeated, I left it to be. I moved away the next year and didn’t stay in touch with anyone from the school.
Six or seven years later, after I had graduated and joined the military, I went back to visit the little town I’d grown up in.
I ran into the girl who had blown me off all those years ago. She was working at a diner. We recognized each other and began talking.
After a while, she told me that she had always liked me in school and was sad I had never asked her out. At this point, I was quite confused, so I brought up the Valentine's gift I had left for her that day.
She got super excited and told me it was the sweetest thing anyone had done for her at that point (I mean, we were kids, so it makes sense).
When I asked her why she had never approached me about it or made a move, she told me that I hadn’t put my name on the note and she had no idea who had left it. Needless to say, we had a good, long laugh over that. I played the “Secret Admirer” game a little too well that day.
[deleted]
37. Drowning Memory
My boyfriend loves surfing. I’ve never surfed, but I had done plenty of bodyboarding while vacationing in Maine. So I thought it was good.
A few months after meeting, he took his sister, his friend, and me to the beach to surf/bodyboard. I felt confident in my bodyboarding abilities, so I paddled out to where he was on his surfboard.
Cue me learning the Pacific Ocean is an entirely different beast than the Atlantic. A set came, and I got a washing machine and spun underneath the water in circles, unable to tell which way was up or down. I wasn’t too worried.
I was a good swimmer, and I had been in this situation before. I find the surface come up to breathe, and another wave knocks me under, spinning again.
I’m still not panicking, but my lungs are getting a little tight. I come up again and can see the wave coming. My boyfriend’s sister and friend are next to me, being worked by the waves as well.
I try to swim for my life so I don’t get hit by the wave again. I don’t think I’ll be able to take another one. The wave hits, and I panic.
Somehow, I found the surface and the beach. His sister was puking in ocean water. His friend sprawled out on the beach. I just sat on my board and called it a day. So much for impressing him.
laurenodonnellf
38. Worst Intrusive Thoughts
Took up her younger (2-3 years) brother's challenge to wrestle on the floor. 15-year-old me was 100% grappled and unable to escape.
He finally let me go after she just sighed and ignored us long enough. The same day, during what I assume was a tickle fight or some crap, I tried to playfully scoop her up off the couch and farted in the process.
I immediately erupted in a fit of hysterical laughter for 5 minutes while she sat there wondering what was so funny about a fart.
I once watched one of the band members at school flirtingly lift her up over his shoulder and carry her around (we were dating, but I was a wimp and not going to say anything). She giggled and afterward said something along the lines of "he's so annoying" in a more-or-less playful manner.
So, in the same basement TV room where her 12-year-old brother rendered me previously motionless on the floor, we were doing nothing when I hoisted her up over my shoulder and stood there for a moment wondering why she wasn't giggling.
I put her down after she said, "What's happening?" at which point I probably stuttered and shrugged it off. I was so helpless.
JohnStint
39. Too Deep
I’ve never been a good swimmer. After lessons and countless times trying, I’m a land-bound creature. I’ve been trying too hard.
However, at the ripe age of 16, with the girl I was wooing over and the 16th Birthday party of our mutual friend being on a local beach, I decided to be a big boy and swim to the small floating platform that was out a few hundred meters, after some goading of course.
So I set off after the girl with the birthday girl, and after about a quarter of the distance and no solid ground beneath me, I realize, oh crap, I’m not gonna make it.
Thus, I started sinking and flailing and effectively trying not to drown, which was only a successful attempt because the birthday girl's dad jumped in and saved me. And to understate it, things didn’t work out with that girl in the end.
carneyvore4423
40. All For Nothing But Wounds
I was biking around the college campus when I ran into my crush and stopped to talk to her. We chat for a few seconds and then part.
I decided, hey, I can bike really fast, so let me do it to impress her. So I take off and round a corner going too fast, and I fall off my bike and slide across a parking lot.
I see her later that night at a club meeting, bloody with ripped clothes, and she asks when that happened. I told her it was right after we talked, and apparently, she never looked back, so it was for nothing. This was only one of many failed attempts to impress her.
PremiumSocks
41. Into The Woods
I was on a double date once, and we went for a walk through the woods. For whatever reason, I thought it would make me look cool if I stripped down to my pants and went for a swim in this stale old pond like I didn't give a damn.
She didn't join me, and neither did the other couple, so I just floated around for a bit, then swam back and realized I didn't have anything to dry off with.
Well, of course, I got dressed and smelled bad in wet clothes for the rest of the date. Goes without saying we didn't meet again.
conr4dbl4ck
42. Painful Entrance
College party. A girl I thought was hot was inside an apartment with a sliding screen door. We had a class together. She sees me gawking.
She waves for me to come in. Seeing my chance, I proceed to do just that. I, however, chose not to open the sliding screen door but to walk right through said sliding screen door. Violently.
I mean, my momentum tore all of the screen right out of the door. I only paused for a moment before continuing on into the room, dragging a shredded metal screen from my now bleeding legs.
I guess I felt that, at that point, I had nothing left to lose. Certainly not my dignity. I sat down next to her in the midst of all her girlfriends.
Who, understandably enough, are snickering away. “Hey, ladies! How is everyone doing this fine evening?” More snickers and some downright laughter.
My girl feels bad for me and drags me away from her friends. I gladly went with her, dragging my own baggage. Proceed to make out with the girl later at the bar. Helped the emotional healing process.
gskitt
43. Skinless Boy
Be me, grade 5, in my second year in Canada, first in an English-speaking school. Playing softball for gym, and everyone is outside watching the game, including my all-time favorite crush (at the time).
I, like the bright genius I am, decide to try to impress her with a sliding safe (bear with me; not a baseball fan, so the terminology is somewhat lost to me).
All good and well until the moment when my legs touch the gravel. Notice how I said gravel? Yep, boys and girls, I didn't take into consideration that people slide on sand or grass, and I ended up with a 1/16-thick slice of skin missing from my leg.
As if that wasn't enough, I also wrote, "I love 'sayyesalottlescrush'" on my desk at school in a whiteout and got booked by another student who proceeded to crush my soul and tell my crush!
saysyesalottle
44. No More Bowling
I was like 10, I think, and at the bowling alley with my mom and little brother. We had the bumpers on, and I saw these two guys go to the lane next to us.
They must have been in high school. They were cool, and I thought they were hot. Anyway, I wanted to be cool and different.
I started throwing the ball really hard and crooked so it'd hit the bumpers as much as possible. So imagine loud banging from a ball hitting the bumpers a good ten times before it hit any pins. They kept looking over, so I thought it was working until one of them came over to me.
I did not want to say to the 10-year-old that I was awesome, but to help me because I was doing that badly. To this day, I feel so stupid. Whenever my mind brings up this memory, I vocally say, "What the heck?"
grayevox_girl
45. Disgusting Endurance
I was in elementary school, grade 5, I believe, and I had a crush on a lovely Asian girl whose name I don't remember. But anyway, lunch was almost over, and I saw my chance and took it.
So I walked over to her and asked her for the rest of her drink because I was thirsty. She said, "Um, I don't think you want this. I backwash."
I continued to lay down the smoothness. "I don't care about that," so she hands it to me, and I proceed to drink half of this girl's lunch that was at the bottom of her chocolate milk.
She just stared at me, so I forced down the swallow and said thanks. It still haunts me to this day, and I refuse to drink after other people. 0/10 would not recommend this method.
Cheify