When you meet your partner's parents, you always want to make a good first impression. You want them to think you are a decent person and have them invite you back for the holidays.
However, for these people, it was anything but that. To call their meeting with their potential inlaws bad is an understatement. Read on and unravel the horrors that came with these worst meetings with parents.
1. Fatal attraction
Dated a girl for just a bit, no plans at all to meet her parents at this point. We had just finished being intimate for the first time when she got a call from her mom,
Apparently, they had a little too much to drink and needed a sober ride home. She asked if I minded and I didn't so we headed to the bar to get them. They were kind enough to be outside waiting for us when we got there.
They were both leaning back on a railing above some concrete steps leading to an outside basement entrance. She waves at them and they wave back.
Her dad lost his balance and went backward over the railing. Her mom looked over and just started wailing. Made her stay in the car and call 911 while I went to see what happened.
He landed just right on the corner of one of the stairs and split his skull wide open. He has passed before I ever said a word to him. That relationship didn't last very long.
FetusChrist
2. Ex-drama
Oh, I have a good one! My husband and I are older (40s) and had been dating for about a year before I met his parents for the first time. They lived on the other side of the country and flew out to visit him.
His ex-girlfriend found out and showed up at the restaurant, sat down, and dominated the conversation with all of the memories she had with them and my husband.
It was awkward as heck. My inlaws absolutely can't stand her, but they are polite people. Anyway, this chick is a hot mess. It’s no wonder she’s an ex.
mauxly
3. Awkward Encounters
I was invited to a (former) boyfriend's house for dinner to meet his parents. When I got there, his father wasn't yet home from work so we decided to go for a walk.
The boyfriend's mother told us to be back to the house by 5, so we were playfully racing each other back so as to make it in time.
I got to the door a few paces ahead of him, opened the door, and found myself face-to-face with his dad who was standing stark naked in front of the door.
I turned around and hid around the corner, the father kind of yelped and ran down the hall, and we were both mortified. Turns out he came home and was getting ready to shower when the phone rang, so he answered it naked since he hadn't expected us back yet.
Janemorrisgoodall
4. Caught red-handed
I met my ex's mom when I was 15. They were a highly catholic family and he wasn't allowed to date. So I would go over after school until it was about time for them to get home.
So we're making out and my shirt comes off. This was pretty escalated for us. Then we heard a car door slam. He grabs my shirt, hands it to me, and tells me to go hide in his closet. So I do. Shirtless.
His mom and he talk for what seems like forever just outside the door. She tells him she's gonna go take a nap so to be quiet.
After she went into her room he came and got me. Right as I am trying to get my shirt on she steps out of her room and sees me. We broke up soon after.
vivolleyball15
5. Not his family’s preference
I dated a Korean guy for a month or so in high school. I went to his house after school one day and encountered his dad on the sidewalk before we made it there.
He looks at me, looks at his son, and begins pointing at me and yelling at him in Korean. I had to awkwardly stand there for about five minutes of them going back and forth.
Eventually, we parted ways and I just went home. Turns out he didn't want him dating a non-Korean and that was what the debate was about.
Jambelaw
6. Stinking up the house
I was sitting at dinner with my girlfriend and her parents. The whole point of the dinner was to meet them and it had just been 10 minutes earlier since we had.
I was having a casual conversation when I sneeze-farted. I tried to play it cool but we all knew what happened. The worst part was that the smell crept in about 30 seconds after it happened after everyone had moved on.
[deleted]
7. “Either leave or say your eulogy”
Her parents had an RV and were on vacation when we met. When they returned home I was being intimate with her in the shower.
Her mom didn't expect anyone to be at the house with her and just walked in. We had been intimate everywhere in the house and she was expecting them home the next day.
Her dad introduced me to his 357 and told me to get the heck out of his house.
I left immediately and I was lucky to still be alive at the end of it all!
kajunkennyg
8. Sermon at dinner
My worst meet-the-parents situation so far was several years ago. I walked into his house and noticed framed photos on the wall.
All of them were stills from when they were on the show "Wife Swap". That in and of itself was no big deal until I saw the episode, but then the father approached me.
I stuck out my hand to shake and he just looked me up and down, turned to his son, and said, "Is she a subscriber to "The Way.'"
Later on, we are all having dinner and his sister is telling the parents how she heard I was very promiscuous and they attempted to evangelize me.
seinsmignon
9. Traumatizing my inlaws
My current boyfriend has extremely Christian and somewhat square parents. They're very sweet, albeit sheltered. So we have a running joke that he uses me for nothing more than being a fun girlfriend.
So he texts and tells me he is at his parent's house. Unbeknownst to me, he hands his iPhone to his mom to look up a brownie recipe.
At the exact moment that I texted him "Tell your parents your fun girlfriend says hello,” which of course popped up. She purportedly shrieked and he now has a cracked screen.
[deleted]
10. Worst Circumstances
I met my wife online back in 1995 when I was 23 and she was a 19-year-old college student. She lived 9 hours away and I had no car, so when it was my turn to visit her, I got a cheap plane ticket.
She came to pick me up at the airport around midnight but parked her car in the wrong place. We returned to her spot to find that the car had been towed away.
We took a cab to the impoundment lot and discovered that they would not release the car to us because her parents owned the car.
My poor long-distance girlfriend had to call her parents around 1 AM and ask them to drive to the impoundment lot (which was an hour away from their house) to get her car out so the two of us could drive back to her apartment for illicit unmarried relations.
When her parents arrived, I introduced myself to her dad, shook his hand, and said "I'm sorry we couldn't have met under better circumstances." He just grunted at me.
[deleted]
11. Accidental Creep!
Oh, I have a good one. It's not a relationship-type meet-the-parents, but it's the worst experience I've had with someone's parents outside of my dysfunctional family.
My friend is the son of one of the Physics professors at my university. So when I got introduced to my future instructor (because I decided to major in Physics), I was forced to make some small talk. He also prepared a lovely dinner for us too!
I had no clue he had three other children in the family so he started talking about them. We talked a lot about how his oldest was in Germany and his second oldest skipped a grade (my friend).
I started spacing out and instead focused on the food and how good it was.
At this time, he mentioned that his youngest daughter was at Girl Guides.
And right when he said that I let out the most satisfying "MMMM" to signify that I was really enjoying his food.
I then clued back into the conversation and said "Girl Guides, yeah I like them".
Which was a mistake when I quickly realized what I had just said. I could see my friend holding back laughter, but I just sat there and ate my food in silence.
He gave me this really weird look and I don't think he's looked at me the same since, even after being my instructor for six upper-level Physics classes. We never spoke of it again, but my friend likes to bring it up every so often.
cooldude1391
12. Saved by common sense and decency
She only had her mother, her father passed away when she was young. I go to her house to wait for her to get home and meet her mom, she has a bottle of dewars on the table.
Her mom was pleasant (not drunk at the time) and she offered me a drink. I normally don't drink the hard stuff, but I decided to be polite and take it.
Her mother gets a phone call, apparently, my new GF is going to be about 2 hours late. The mother sits down next to me on the couch and talks to me.
Then the unthinkable happens, her mom (not very attractive by the way) puts her hand on my upper thigh. She says we have 2 hours if I'm interested and smiles.
Now at the time, I was only 18, but I had enough common sense to get the heck out of there real quick. Meet up with my GF later on that night and don't even bring up what happened (what good could it do right?).
2 days later my GF shows up at my house and is wide-eyed, her breath is labored (she ran to my house). She tells me that one of her best friends just told her that he slept with her mom. I asked when it happened, and she said 2 nights ago.
So made the right choice!
MadLintElf
13. Slobber everywhere
The first time my alcoholic ex was in my family's home, he was, well, drunk. And lying on the dining room floor. My mom walked in and he squinted up at her and started insulting her.
The ex after him was a much better person. First time at the house, he's meeting my family's dog, who is greeting him with copious amounts of slobber.
In walks my grandfather. I introduce, they go to shake hands, and the ex tells my grandfather, "Sorry, I've got dog slobber on my hands." My grandfather doesn't miss a beat and tells him, "That's ok, I'm sure you've had worse."
ckillgannon
14. Mission Impossible
It was the first time I had ever gone to a girlfriend's house to hang out and meet her parents. It was the summer before my 8th grade year. Needless to say, HORMONES! So I was an awkward, squeaky barely teenage boy.
Her parents were really excited to meet me because I was the first boy her daughter had ever introduced them to, so they planned a family cookout so I could meet ALL the family.
I got there around 5 pm, and, because it was in the country in Ohio, all the adults were already drunk. To avoid as many drunk family members as possible, my girlfriend and I decided to swim in her pool for most of the night.
At around 9 pm, most of her family had left; only her parents remained. They were inside (still drinking) and my girlfriend decided we would have some "naughty time" in the pool.
We hid our clothes under the towels on the deck so it wouldn't be too obvious. After about ten minutes of fun skinny dipping, her parents decided to come out to check on us.
However, in their drunken stupor, they decided instead to get in the pool with us. My trunks and my girlfriend's bottoms weren't easily accessible while remaining entirely in the pool, so I had to swim around naked while my girlfriend's parents were in the pool.
I never knew how good of a swimmer I was until that day, because they never found out! However, I didn't date her for much longer after that.
thatoneguybrad
15. Stitches, kisses, and being kicked out
I'm the queen of bad first impressions… I think the worst of it was my senior year of high school. I was out drinking with friends and a guy I had been hooking up with.
We ended up climbing onto a school tin roof and continued to get plastered. The guy I was seeing thought it'd be a good idea to try to run across the roof, but ended up slipping and sliding down.
He fell two stories straight on his face.. we seriously thought he died. There was blood everywhere, and none of his jackass friends wanted to take him to the hospital, so I did.
Fast forward a crapload of stitches, and hours later I realized my parents would be PISSED if I came home that late. He insisted his mom would be fine with me over, and that we'll just have to go through his window so the front door alarm wouldn't wake anyone up.
So I stayed the night and slept in nothing but a bra and underwear. Fast forward to 8 am, and I wake up to "What the heck is this?!? You must be Cblmnop? Why the hell are you staying over?!?"... "Mom, I'm sorry.. it won't..." ... "holy crap, what the hell happened to your face?!? Get out of my house!!" .... the Worst experience of my life.
Cblmnop
16. Probably not the best way to meet your in-laws
The first time I met my fiance's mother, we had to walk past her to go to his bedroom, and he said, "Hi Mom, this is Kate." I said hi, she said hi, and that was it. We were more formally introduced in the morning.
But the next time we saw each other I came stumbling drunk into the house, told her how much I loved Buffy (she was watching it), and had a 5-minute conversation with their dog about how soft he was.
Two and a half years later, she's going to be my mother-in-law. And when her son and I were having a pretty serious argument a while ago she said to him, "If you break up with her, I'm trading you for her."
nancydrewskillz
17. More of the same
When I met my ex-girlfriend's Father, I asked her what I should wear and she suggested a white T-shirt and a blue sweater. This was her suggestion.
Cut to the introduction in the lounge and her dad is wearing the exact same thing. Of course, it gets worse, we then went to a local restaurant for a meal, and a guy at the table next to us was wearing the exact same thing as well.
Whut_What
18. Too hot to wear clothes
My mom likes to walk around topless. This was an issue when I lived at home.
My first serious boyfriend in college walked in for our Thanksgiving dinner and my mom is vacuuming topless.
She screams, "HIIIII EXBOYFRIENDS NAME" and he goes "Hi!..." And I watch as he turns around slowly with this look of fear in his eyes.
From where I was standing I couldn't see her, and he walked up to me and says "Your mom is topless." My dad and I walk into the room and I bust out laughing, and my dad tells her to go put on a shirt.
The second time another ex-boyfriend and I just got home and we walked in and ONCE again this woman wasn't wearing a shirt. He tries to act natural and says hello then goes to another room.
Chalupacabrariley
19. Good intentions
When I was in 8th grade we had a group science project. We met at this girl's house to do the project. I have zero interest in the said female.
I arrive at her house first when her dad answers the door with a creepy smile and hands me his shotgun. "Can you hold this real quick?"
What the heck dude? I'm just trying to get my science on. I'm not trying to get my science on your daughter. I was very annoyed.
asleeplessmalice
20. One-upping my future father-in-law
I had only been dating this girl for a couple of months, but she wanted to travel back home for a cousin's wedding and asked me to go. I agreed knowing that this meant I was definitely going to have to meet her parents.
The wedding was in her hometown out in the sticks of south Texas. We get to her parent's house just after dinner time. Both her parents were on the front porch sitting in rocking chairs.
We walk up to the porch and make our introductions. Mother is a very nice and sweet southern belle type, seeing as she was from Louisiana.
She asked if I'd like some sweet tea. Yep. Mother goes into the house to get the tea and GF goes with her to help. This leaves me alone with Father.
He seems to have a very sour look on his face and is not at all pleased to meet me. (I later learn that this is just the way he looks. All the time) I sit down in the vacated rocking chair and a small table separates us.
He pulls out a small .38 special with a recessed hammer and places it on the table between us. He says, "This is meant to be fired from a jacket pocket. You'd never see it coming."
I look down at his gun on the table and then look up at him, then back at the gun, then back up at him and he has these squinty eyes that seem to be drilling into mine.
I then slowly reach behind my back, pull out my Desert Eagle 5.0, and place it in front of me on the table. It is audibly heavy and has a satisfying "ta-chunk" sound when I lay it down. ( I have a CHL). I said to him, "This is my Desert Eagle. It's meant to kill people. Efficiently."
At that moment, his eyes lit up and a smile grew on his face that I didn't think could get any bigger without his face crackin' in two. Very soon after the GF and Mother came back out with the tea.
I grabbed my gun and holstered it and got up for Mother to sit down. Father looks at GF and points at me and says, "I like this one." Father and I got along just fine. Ahh....memories.
bumpty
21. Big feet mean the biggest personalities
I have a mild but awkward story about dating the boss's daughter. I had just started working at a provincial park so I got to meet my new boss and my girlfriend's father at the same dinner at her house.
So we were having dinner at her parent's place and her dad asked me what size boots I wore. (They provided them....the park, not her family).
He's shorter than average, maybe 5'4. I'm 6' tall but I have big feet so when I said that I wear size 13 he gave me one look that turned from "Wow those are big feet" to "Wow, this guy is probably hung like a horse" to "you're not going anywhere near my daughter". Of course, I still did.
[deleted]
22. Sleepy Steve
The first time I met my now future in-laws I wasn't with my fiancée at the time. We were freshmen in college and one of her friends from high school was one of my roommates.
Well, one day he and I were hanging out at our place, I'm baked as hell and I think he was probably a bit drunk. Anyway, all of sudden she knocks on our door and very sheepishly tells us her parents are here visiting and want to meet her new college friends.
She tells us she really hasn't made any friends but doesn't want to look pathetic in front of her parents so ask if we will help cover for her.
She had told them most of her friends were at class but that she knew we would be around. So my buddy and I went to her dorm and there were her parents both of whom were nice enough, but I guess I looked even more baked than I felt.
Her parents kept asking if I had been studying all night or something because I looked so "tired" so I just went with it and agreed.
Fast forward three months we have started dating and she is talking to her parents on the phone, she tells them about me, and for the first few years we dated I was "sleepy Steve".
Not that embarrassing I guess, but I'm not sure if they have ever put together that I was really baked the first time we met.
gwsteve43
23. Wrong stereotypes
My now wife is a Mexican immigrant and so is her family. She is 5'2" on a good day. I'm 5'10". I assumed that her family is small in stature like she is and maybe a stereotyped version of Mexicans that I envisioned. Nope.
I meet her ham-fisted father who I find out was a Federale, a Boxer and a Bodyguard in Mexico in the '70s and '80s is 6'4" and 260 and her older brother is just as tall but not as heavy, and her younger brother who was 14 at the time is 6'1".
She also has two sisters who are my height. To be fair I was told all kinds of stories about her Dad and one of her sisters. Her dad beat the crap out of her sister's crazy boyfriend. Her sister getting into knockdown drag-out brawls at clubs.
So I am introduced as her "friend" because she has told me her father is very strict and she wasn't allowed to date in high school. Now at this time, we are in our 20's.
I sit on the couch and they are all watching a George Lopez comedy special. I didn't want to laugh at all the Mexican jokes because I didn't want to offend anyone.
Her older brother turns to me and says "You don't think this is funny?" I squeak out a feeble response and he leaves me alone.
Turns out it was all in my head, I had some misconceptions and false expectations, and was a bit silly, to be frank. But now some 8 years later they are the best inlaws one could want.
Z-and-I
24. You have the wrong guy
Snuck over to my now ex-girlfriend's house when her mom went to work to have a little fun. In the middle of 'doing it,' we hear the front door open downstairs.
We freak out and decide to try and hide me against her bed and the wall. I'm 6'3 so my feet were hanging out at the end. My ex nervously goes to talk to her mom to see what's up, but her mom knows something is going on.
She comes busting in sees my feet and says come out. Says ''its nice to meet you, Nick''. I zipped up my pants, said ''my name is actually Will'', and got the heck out of there.
Amyjuergens
25. Worst night to make a mistake
It wasn't my experience, but my first boyfriend's experience with my parents. Dear God, it still makes me cringe. He was in a band and had a ton of female friends, most of whom he lived nearby and had known for his entire life, so sleepovers were fine.
The night before our middle school "graduation" he slept over with his friends and they decided to paint his fingernails.
We painted each nail a different color. So after "graduation" he and his mom were going to pick me up so we could go to some super sweet 8th grader party.
He gets there and I tell him to just put his hands in his pockets because I don't know how my parents would react to something so strange.
That's when my middle-aged father decides to come inside from around the pool wearing nothing but his hot pink speedo to meet his second daughter's first boyfriend. CJ if you're reading this, I'm still so damn sorry... even though I laugh-cringe about it still.
WeHaveGuns
26. Nonchalant
I went over to his house and his mom was on the couch playing a DS I think. We were going swimming, so I came back into the house and had my wet bikini on.
Anyway, the dad comes in drunk, sees me, and says hi, then asks her where his shotgun is because there was a stray dog that was trying to bite them at his garage (did mechanic work).
She then proceeds to find it for him, but she is a little drunk too, and mad that he interrupted her game. It was a little weird. My bf at the time just kind of took me to his room.
Later, the mom walked in and we were just cuddling, but his shirt was off and I was on top of him. She then let the younger brother in to play computer.
She saw us, but couldn't have cared less. It's not the absolute worst story or anything, but just very awkward and weird.
Gymnastyflipper
27. Out of luck
The first time I met my friend's mom was when she opened the door to his room to find that her son and his friend (me) were drinking.
We had an 18-pack on the floor, and a pyramid of beer cans on her nice table that we had moved into said room. It was a terrible scene.
That day she found out that her son had ditched school to get drunk and play GTA with me. First and only time she ever came home from work early.
TonyNowak
28. When life gives you olives
I was talking to my girlfriend's dad outside. For some reason, the conversation turned to grapes. At this exact time, my girlfriend came at me with what I believed to be a grape.
I opened my mouth for the sweet nectar. It was not a grape. It was an olive. Now, the juxtaposition of flavors would be bad for most people.
However, in my case, it was the difference between one of my favorite things to the absolute worst food in the world. I mean, you would think I was allergic.
So, did I calmly walk to the restroom and spit out this monstrosity? Nope, my fun brain decided I should scream like a little girl, literally, push through every single one of my girlfriend's family to loudly spit and wash my mouth out in the bathroom.
From time to time, my father-in-law still asks if I want any olives...
elmatador12
29. Alpha Male Energy
In my younger, testosterone-fueled, chest-thumping, days I met my girlfriend's Dad. He went in for the handshake and sneak attacked me with the two-handed, double clasp, firm grip.
So in order to demonstrate my alphamaleism I did the spartan warrior forearm grab. He quickly escalated to the left hand on shoulder disappointed father pose.
In response to this, while maintaining an ever tighter grip with my right hand, I reached up and patted his head. He was bald, it was awesome, and I totally won.
peetapocket
30. Destroying the bathroom
At the time I was in college, me and this girl had already been dating for about 6 months, but since we both lived a long distance in opposite directions I'd never met her parents.
So they decided to come up one weekend and bring a trailer to help her move her furniture into her new house. She told me to wait there while she went and met them at her aunt's house to load stuff.
I thought it was weird she didn't want me to come but not important. So I sat there for what became hours and hours and during this time my lower GI tract decided to voice its displeasure with me.
I tried to sit there as long as I could but eventually, I figured they hadn't gotten back yet so it would still probably take them a little while. Went into the bathroom and unleashed one of the biggest craps I've ever taken.
And while I'm sitting there I hear my gf walks into the house looking for me. I got up and flushed the toilet and to my horror, the water rose but never subsided with this great testament to the fecal lords piled in the center.
All I could do was shut the door while I met her parents and they had a queer look on their faces while they sniffed the air, smelling something foul.
To top it off her mom was a police officer and was talking about a murder at a crime scene and other fun stuff for a first-time meet-the-parents encounter.
calliwildcat
31. An unexpected opening
The first time he met my parents. We were hanging out downstairs, both 16, still just getting to know each other. He'd already met my mom and that had been all boring and normal. Then my dad came home.
Keep in mind we haven't even kissed at this point. He came in, saw us lying on the giant bean bag side by side on our stomachs talking, and made an 'oh, you two look comfy' comment and gave the how do you do's.
Unfortunately for the guy who is now my husband, then I was given an opening I should not have been given. My dad asked if he could get us anything.
Before I even thought about it, I went 'Yeah, a box of protection and some toys for intimacy.’ I went on to list these toys one by one in front of him.
My dad looks from me (with a huge ass grin on my face) to my now hubby (who was beet red, face pressed into the bean bag chair), looked back at me, and then walked out.
We'll have been married for three years at the end of this month, and I'm still in no small amount of trouble over it. I will probably be hearing about it for the rest of our lives. :)
skyqween
32. Tell us the truth
My ex was Italian. I flew to Italy to meet her parents and go straight from the airport to this huge family dinner with aunts, uncles, and cousins. Ex leaves for the bathroom and the father asks his wife to translate a question.
The whole table is silent, she says "My husband would like to know if you love my daughter?" I laughed awkwardly and took a sip out of my drink, praying they were joking. No. The whole table is silent waiting for my response, so I mumbled "Err yess.."
Jeffma
33. Never recovered from that
I met an ex's parents for the first time while they were cleaning out their loft. The dad was in the attic handing stuff down the ladder to the mum.
I helped out to get brownie points even though I'd recently hurt my back, by the mum handing the stuff to me and me organizing it into little piles.
Anyway, the dad hands this toaster down and the mum drops it and is bending over fumbling with the wire picking it up, while I'm stood behind, facing her, attempting to crack my spine by pushing my fists against my lower back and rhythmically swinging my hips back and forth.
The brother comes out of his room and shakes his head at me, my girlfriend comes up the stairs and shakes her head at me, and it was only after I saw the look of utter fury from her dad in the loft that I realized what he thought I was doing to his wife.
I shook it off by jokingly trying to high-five the brother with my best Borat impression. Nobody was impressed. It was awkward from then on out. For four whole years.
[deleted]
34. Turning the odds in my favor
This wasn't the worst for me, it was the worst for her father. You know the whole "I'm gonna clean/hold onto a gun when I first meet him" thing some fathers will do?
Well, I went over to a ladyfriend's (I say this because it wasn't a very serious thing and just slowly ended a few weeks later) house one time to have dinner, and her father was cleaning his AR-15.
The funny thing was that he had the thing entirely dismantled. The pistol grip and stock were taken off the lower, and the entire front assembly was dismantled from the upper.
He had everything set up neatly on a mat and all the cleaning stuff laid out like a surgeon. I think the best part about this was the fact that this was the only time her father had done it, so his attempt to make me scared (In a relatively anti-gun town, no less), was completely foiled by its absurdity and the fact that I love firearms.
He even tried out a macho, "You know what this is, son?" Needless to say, that barbecue was fantastic. I still miss that old man, not his daughter.
LordRaison
35. Hidden Messages From A Tough Father
Her Dad took me to the basement, pulled me into some weird closet room, gestured to the safe, and allowed me to open it.
The man was ready for the zombie apocalypse...A half dozen or so automatic rifles, several shotguns, and a handful of handguns...and BOXES of ammo.
He pulled out the AR-15 with a laser scope on top and said "Here...hold it", to which I grabbed it. He goes "How does that feel?" To which I replied "Heavy".
He laughs and grabs it from me, puts it back in the safe, shuts the door, and stares at me with a scowl. I just said "I understand" and he instantly smiled and said "Good man" and we went back upstairs.
Turns out he's a great guy and is just protective of his only daughter. I'm marrying her in 2 weeks and I'm happy to say I consider him my father as well. It all worked out and I knew my place!
Smoresypoo
36. Sloppy Coverup
I was 16. We were fooling around with my girlfriend at her house when her parents were gone. That was when we heard her parents pull into the driveway.
We stopped, she zipped up her pants, and we ran out to the living room, jumping onto the couch and turning on the TV to pretend to watch something.
Her parents walk in, groceries in hand, and I am introduced to my GF's dad, whom I had never met. Thinking quickly, I offer my right hand to him. We shake.
Then he grabs my hand and holds onto it. He has a weird look on his face, and in sudden shock, I realize why: My fingers were a dead giveaway.
I quickly wrestled my hand from his grip, made up some excuse about how I had to go home and walked out. The relationship did not last long after that.
invictusmedic
37. Snitching officer
The night before I met my girlfriend's Mom, my girlfriend and I decided to go into a field and do the wild thing in my truck.
As stuff is about to get started, a police car rolls up with its lights on. He was a complete jerk and made us call our parents (we were 20).
He explained to her in the middle of the night that I had her daughter half-naked in my truck. Lunch was ssoooooo awkward the next day.
[deleted]
38. Meeting a real man
I went over to my only girlfriend's house to finally meet the parents. We were going to have lunch with them. (This was my senior year of high school).
I walk in, and he is sitting there. He is 6'6, with biceps as big as my waist, a former marine. He had a beer gut, but you could tell underneath he had some abs. Basically, he was the definition of a man.
For some reason, I chose that day to wear my Metallica t-shirt. I don't know why. All I know is throughout the entire lunch he would give me the evil eye.
I then hung out with my then-girlfriend at her house, barricaded in the media room for fear he would kill me. He was clearly capable.
Then the next day, I found out that he signed everyone in the family up for self-defense classes and brought out his handgun from the attic. Additionally, he bought my girlfriend some self-defense weapons. That was fun.
fivebizebeavers
39. A slow burn at the door
This is probably one of the best that I know, but I'll share it anyway. When she was in high school or college, my aunt dated Ted Nugent.
He showed up at my grandparent's house to pick her up in a black hearse one night. My grandfather answered the door, stared at him for a second, and yelled back into the house, "Tom’s aunt, your girlfriend is here." Then walked away.
Fakefx
40. Why I hate stuffing
In grade 10 I was seeing a girl. We had been intimate and had fooled around for about a month. One spring day my mom comes charging down to my room more pissed than I have ever seen her and rips my laptop out of my hands telling me to stay in my room.
Turns out her dad came to my house and he knew about some pictures his daughter sent to me. Also, both her parents were cops and they threatened me with charges.
The next time I saw those people was at an Easter dinner 2 weeks later with her entire family. It was one of the most awkward situations of my life. I tried stuffing for the first time, and to this day it reminds me of this situation.
Try-Force
41. Bold movie choices
It wasn't really as bad as it was funny, but the first time I met my boyfriend's dad at their house he told me about how on a date once he watched the movie "Body Heat" with his girlfriend and her parents and that it was weird.
I wasn't familiar with the movie so we sat next to each other on the couch and watched the trailer on YouTube (for those who aren't familiar I gathered it was a movie about sweaty people being intimate).
He then proceeded to ask me some weird questions that had me shuddering by the end of it all. It was a weird and slightly funny scenario.
[deleted]
42. Threats before bed keep the mischief away
I was invited to spend the night with this girl at her dad's house one county over from the one I lived in. I think I was 14 and she was a bit older.
She wasn't the most attractive girl but at this age, I was trying to lose it no matter what it took. When we get to her dad's house I'm introduced to her older brother.
He's like twenty-something and her Dad is this huge muscular bald guy. The girl and I start watching TV in the living room and at one point her dad comes up behind me, wraps a towel around my neck, and says "If you touch her I will end you".
Then he releases me and just cracks up and pats me on the shoulder like it's hilarious. We spent the whole next day working in this little ice cream booth while her dad carved animals out of logs with a chainsaw and tried to sell them for like $900 dollars each.
AnotherUrbanAchiever
43. Saved by humor
I was chatting with my girlfriend while she was on the phone with her parents. They knew of me at this point and that was it. She is black and I'm white.
Father: Why do you want to date a black girl anyway?
My official answer to this question would be that it's meaningless to me what her race/ethnicity is. I honestly don't think of it very much unless we get nasty stares or comments then I remember that were supposed to be controversial.. even in a liberal college town.
Me (speaking only to my girlfriend!) pfft... jungle fever.
Girlfriend: Oh, he says jungle fever.
I almost freaking died. His parents think I'm "whiter than cream cheese" so they found it hilarious that I'd even know what jungle fever is. They laughed for about five minutes.
PeterMus
44. So, not like a rockstar?
I met my wife freshman year of college. After finals, she went back to Connecticut and spent the whole summer apart. Upon arriving back at school my first stop was the grocery store to pick up some provisions, and, by chance, I saw her down the cereal aisle.
So I figure I'll make the grand gesture and I start running up to her and then I drop to my knees to slide into her like it's some freaking musical.
But then her mom steps in between us and I slide face-first into her butt. We are good friends now but I’ll never forget that moment.
ecogeek
45. Teaching her father some manners
My exes dad was a complete jerk. He wouldn't wish family members happy birthday, he wouldn't contribute towards the bills, he would just spend their money, eat their food, and hibernate in his room doing god knows what.
I went around for the first time about 4 years ago (now 20). As soon as I stepped through the door he gripped me up in the hallway and started shouting down my face.
I was big for my age, about 5'11 somewhere between 180-188lbs and I was an amateur boxer. I let him shout in my face for a bit and say what he had to say.
When I was silent he did it again. I punched him as hard as I could in his face and knocked him clean out. He never spoke to me again and moved in with his mistress 6 months later.
Her mum and sister were amazing and I used to go round for a Sunday roast all the time. I loved that family.
Artexa