People Share The Secrets They Would Never Tell Their Spouse

I don't have a spouse or SO as I'm single and have been for 18 years. The reason is I found my fiance dead in bed and have blamed myself all these years. I fell asleep on the couch and woke up the following morning. Made her a cup of tea before checking on our son who was 4 days away from his first birthday. Then I went into our room to find a sight that has haunted me ever since.    

At first, I told myself I wanted to concentrate on raising our son. Then it just became the norm. I would tell people that I'm happy being single but the truth is I keep imagining going through that again and just preventing anyone from getting close.

I let my guard down a few years back and started a brief relationship with a colleague which she initiated and seemed keen only for her to cheat and lie to me, sending me back to square one again.

I tell family and friends I'm happy but the truth is I struggle some days. Our son is 19 now and I'm dreading the day he moves out. I hate coming home to an empty house but the prospect of getting close to someone again and losing them scares me more.

Photolincs

One time I thought I locked my keys in the car.

(They were in my pocket. Yep. I figured it out halfway through and by then I decided to die with this secret. Sometimes I detach the ignition key off my huge keychain to make it easier and I peeked through my car, saw the keychain didn't even check my pockets and just assumed I left all my keys in the locked car. Stupid.). 

We had to walk 2 miles to her friend's job up a hill which was super cold, windy as a freaky condition, in flip flops and not suitable clothing, and then we got a super awkward drive to her house from her friend, then we had to drive 30 minutes to my house, got my spare keys, went back, and give the other dude some gas money.

It took us like 2 hours and we were both exhausted and wanting to go home at the start of it and then I had of course to drive back and drop her off and then get gas and then go home. Lol.

torquemycork 

My mother-in-law came to visit us and she and my wife were home when I arrived home from work. 

Her mother was not feeling well because she was taking her temperature. When I looked in the medicine cabinet I realized that the oral thermometer was still in the cupboard and the thermometer for my son (that went inside the body *cough) was missing. 

They look very similar and I suggested to my wife that we needed to mark one so no mishaps would ever occur. My wife told me that I was being ridiculous, so I didn’t because I knew the difference between the two, but oh well!

rastroboy

One time I left my younger daughter (middle child) in a hot car and forgot she was there. 

My wife and my oldest daughter had gotten out and went into a theater where the oldest daughter had her dance recital. I parked the car about 100 feet away and for some reason, maybe because my wife and daughter got out, my stupid brain just decided to go into kid-free mode. 

To say I panicked 10 minutes later when I remembered would be an understatement. I was in mid-conversation with someone and when I remembered her I just turned and ran. No explanation. 

I sprinted to the car, but knowing it was only 10 minutes I knew it would be ok. There she was. A little sweaty, but just sitting there and looking around. Smiled when she saw me. 

This memory haunts me. I frequently lose sleep or have to pull my mind off it. The thought of what would have happened and how easy it was to forget her will never leave me. Always double-check for your kids folks. Even if you think you’re good or have a great memory.

Dougthebugg

I knocked the TV off the Ikea Kallax shelf. I was walking quickly with the laundry basket half on my hip and knocked onto the shelf. The TV came tumbling down and landed upside down on some shoes. I guess the shoes cushioned the fall because the TV works perfectly.

My husband has told me a thousand times to slow down so I won't bump into things, which I do often. I will never tell him that the TV fell from five feet and it was my fault. 

I also accidentally popped a leg off of my mother-in-law's antique queen Anne-style vanity/dressing table. It has seven other legs and I wedged it back in place. No one knows or ever will.

Kitty_in_the-city

My mother-in-law (81), who lives with us and is generally not too bad to be around, was complaining to me, my wife, and son were at work, about how much noise our two grandgirls make in the house during the day. They, 5 and 7, are spending the summer with our son, who lives with us while he goes back to school after his divorce. This was day 3 of them being here.

We have a 5 bedroom house, and my mother-in-law occupies two rooms and a bathroom of her own.

After multiple statements saying I need to discipline the girls and "train them to be quiet," Mother-in-law says, "I have never been able to stand children. As a teenager, I refused to babysit because I couldn't stand children. Now don't get me wrong, I love you, your son, my grandchildren, the dogs, *and I even love my daughter*, but I just can't stand being around children at all."

She pauses for a few moments looking at me expectedly, so I say, "The day will never arrive where I discipline or "train these girls to be quiet" for laughing and playing. The majority of the laughing and running you heard was because I was playing with them, tickling them, and chasing them."

We live in Florida. By 10 am it was 92° and 74% humidity. It was nasty outside. The girls didn't want to be outside, the dogs didn't, and I didn't. Not only that, but by 2  p.m. the thunder and lightning started with heavy rain. So that particular day was spent inside watching movies, playing various games, and just outright being loud with imagination, laughter, and love.

She looks shocked and angry. 

Then says, "Don't get me wrong, as I said, I love you all, but that love should be from a distance. That's always been best for me because I'm set in my ways and if I stay here, I will end up yelling at those girls and doing the discipline myself since you and your son can't seem to do it properly or at all."

I said, "You will never raise your voice or hand to them, period. You will find your 81-year-old ass in a nursing home or jail. So perhaps you should love from a distance and go live with your sister. I understand your sister can't stand being around you for more than a few days, but I'm sure it will at least be quiet."

She has now moved in with her sister, who lives 12 miles away. She has told my wife it's just until the girls go back to their mothers at the end of summer. I'll have to tell my wife a version of this but not with "even my daughter part". 

My wife and brother-in-law already know how their mother was. How she treated them as kids. But if I tell my wife she was an "I even love" that was an afterthought, after the dogs were mentioned, well, that's just not part of the story I'll ever repeat.

Blackhawk-388

After our second child, my wife was feeling self-conscious about her body.  So she wanted to shake things up.  She went to a spa, got pampered for the day, and then for the first time in her life got bangs.

I do not prefer short hair, bangs included.  But, she came home so proud and asked me what I thought. It was already done. What was I supposed to say? "You look amazing,". I held onto my disdain for them for about 4 years until she decided she wanted to grow them back.  

This was where I messed up. 

She asked me if it'd be okay if she grew her hair back out (not in a weird "she has to check with me before making changes" way, but in an "I know you like the bangs, but I want something different" kind of way). 

I slipped and said I'd love for her to grow her hair back out as bangs aren't my favorite look.  A conversation ensued and she has made it a point to tell all her friends how I lied to her for years (joking, not serious) and every person has responded the same when they hear the story:  "WTH was he supposed to say?"

The moral of the story is to either be straightforward from the start OR hold onto that until you die. Lol. On the flip side, we joke about it a lot.

ICPG8milenko

I cheated on my ex. She was abusive to me, insulted me, screamed at me, scratched me, hit me, threw things at me, but I felt stuck. I reached out to a female friend of mine after an especially heavy argument where she threw an insulated bottle into my face, and she consoled me. 

One thing led to another, and we were intimate. After that, I felt dirty, but it also opened my eyes. It felt like the ties that kept me with my abusive ex were cut. I was able to break up with her, and now found a girlfriend I wouldn't even think of cheating on.

I also told that friend of mine about it and how I wouldn't want to have that happen again, to which she said she felt like I needed to realize that there are others out there that'll give me the respect I deserve. She was right, and she was happy that I finally found a home.

The reason I wouldn't tell her is because her ex cheated on her twice, and I know what she'd think of me if I told her that.

Schinkenkanone

I tend to just sit in my car for many hours at a time. Last week, I used an entire half tank of gas just by idling for hours at a time. 

My girlfriend knows this, but what she doesn’t know is why I do it.

I have severe PTSD from seeing horrific deaths, being abused in group homes, being abused in mental hospitals, and being made fun of my entire life for having mental health issues. 

The only way I can handle it without going insane is by sitting in my car, listening to music, and relaxing. Sounds weird right? Well, my car isn’t just any car. 

I got it from my aunt, and she was the one who took care of me as a kid when my dad was absent (which was every day). She took me for drives every week in that car to get me out of the house, and to get ice cream with her and my cousin. 

This car also has memories of me and my grandpa working on it together, since it’s my first car and I wanted to modify it a bit along with repairing some stuff on it.

That car holds so many special memories and it all comes flooding back when I sit in there, so I feel a whole lot better when I come inside my house or when I call my girlfriend. It’s a coping mechanism, but I don’t want to tell my girl because I don’t want her to worry about me

Ihooper05

I used to have a private Instagram handle where I'd film my breakfast on any given morning as I poured hot sauce on it. But the value proposition over other Instagram foodies was that I would make all sorts of orgasm noises as I "shot" Tapatio or what have you all over my over-easy eggs. I was filming myself giving my morning meal a spicy money shot with earnest sound effects.

The account was private, and only my friends' follow requests were permitted (not that there was any wider demand to follow it at all). It was a hit in my social circle bringing tears of laughter to some of their eyes, even. 

But after I started seriously dating my current girlfriend, I removed all followers and haven't posted or spoken about it since.

Sometimes my friends when present in mixed company with my girlfriend will drop a thinly veiled reference to it, but I've countered with the thinly veiled threat to reveal it to them so that they follow it 

themselves and enjoy it thoroughly. It's an enjoyable cold war I am waging against my buddies with the risk of mutually assured destruction.

taste_so_good_baby-y

I spent the night at his place the literal first day I met him and he ended up drinking too much. In the middle of the night, he got up, walked to the foot of the bed, and peed all over my feet.

Then he walked to the kitchen and tried to pee in the sink but must have missed because I heard him get paper towels and wipe the floor. 

Then he came back to bed like nothing happened. Didn’t remember it in the morning. 

I know he’d be humiliated if he found out so I’m just gonna keep this one tucked away in my brain.

Coloradobluesky 

I’m 32. I met my girlfriend when I was 30. I’ve never had a relationship before that. When I was 25, still having no luck with girls and having never been shown interest by anyone before, I decided I was just gonna take the leap and lose my virginity. 

I visited an escort (it’s somewhat legal where I’m from) and it was honestly a pleasant experience. I’ve been visiting escorts/call girl, whatever you want to call it, ever since. I’d visit once every few months.

When I met my girlfriend, we didn’t immediately get together but I was kind of attracted to her but thought I had no chance. So the first few months after meeting her, I was still seeing escorts. 

It wasn’t until we kinda talked a bit more and suddenly clicked that I stopped. I felt a deeper connection than just attraction but we still weren’t anything more than friends, but I did feel for the first time that I had a chance.

 So I just stopped seeing escorts and a bit later, we officially got together. 

I don’t know if she would be accepting or disgusted by how much I’ve visited escorts before, but I don’t plan on allowing her to think about it. Both of us have a past that we admit to but don’t want to elaborate on. She mentioned one of her exes was abusive but doesn’t want to revisit them so I don’t pry. 

Similarly, when talking about relationship experience, I’ve told her I’m not inexperienced but I also don’t want to share more than that. I don’t want to tell her that before her, all my relationship experience has been through payment.

I was so convinced I’d never find a life partner that it still feels surreal to me now that I have a girlfriend and I never want to lose her and go back to being hopeless. While I’m not exactly ashamed of it, I do feel this piece of my past has the potential to jeopardize my relationship and I’m not risking it. She’s the best thing that’s happened to me

Muzihill 

I realized a big role my husband played in me being alive today. I was legally kidnapped and sent to one of those abusive wilderness therapy programs and later an abusive etc as a teen, only 3 months after he and I started dating. l, because of the way I was taken. 

I was quite literally a missing person to him for 8 months and was fully convinced that when I managed to make it back home, he would’ve moved on with someone else for we were teenagers who’d only been together 3 months so like.

The only reason I didn’t kill myself out there was because I knew I had to tell him didn’t just abandon him & it wasn’t my choice. I figured once I got that chance, I'd be able to freak off, ruin my life, and kill myself with a little bit of peace. 

The thought of getting closure to him was enough to keep me pushing, and shockingly when I finally managed to (secretly) get ahold of him on my first visit back home, he had waited for me. 

He managed to give me an unbelievable amount of hope and much-needed mental escape from those hellholes, whether it was just a hope of closure or the hope of him wanting to be with me. 

He is truly and legitimately the only reason I'm still alive today. I've kinda told him how much he did to me, but I'll never tell him the full extent because I don’t think it’s appropriate to put much pressure on someone. 

Anyways, we’ve now been together six years, almost one year married and we’re gonna be welcoming our second child into the world here by next year. Sorry this was kinda long, I just like talking about him whenever I can lol

Uwunisom 

I found the ring in the closet a month before he proposed. Each day I looked if it was still in its place. One day we fought, like we sometimes do. I looked in the closet again and it was gone. I was scared he changed his mind because of our fight. But he didn't. The day after that, he proposed to me.

The thing I didn't know, but he told me afterward, that the ring had been there for about six years. He never moved it and was so sure to have found the perfect hiding spot.

 It was his closet full of random stuff, I never went through it, but that day I was looking for something I knew was stored in there. He wanted to wait for the perfect moment, but in his eye, it never came, so years passed. And then he just chose to do it, without any special occasion, because the perfect moment didn't seem to exist (maybe he just wasn't ready yet).

I never told him because I wanted him to keep thinking that he surprised me. But I always find the thought funny that I never noticed it except for that one month before he asked me.

Nopemyselfout

One time when I had just gotten out of the shower my cat started meowing and was very friendly. I, despite being a little damp and undressed decided I would humor this cute kitty and give her a belly rub. 

While crouching down like a goblin wearing an Adidas tracksuit asking for a cigarette after a three-day coke bender, I felt a tiny little fart coming on, nothing major, so I pushed a little bit harder… and next thing I knew I had just shat on the carpet like an absolute creature. 

My cat was horrified but I like to think she forgave me, I never told my girlfriend at the time (now ex) because I don’t think she could have emotionally handled it.

Kariomartking

I think mine is a bit funnier but it taught me a good lesson. Back in fourth grade, I was really into pokémon cards. I had just bought a card from a store and wanted to show my friends so I decided to bring some of my rarest cards to school the next day. 

I showed all my friends and some other people I knew in the morning and they all thought it was pretty cool. The end of the day was approaching and I was packing up when I realized that my cards were gone from where I put them in my bag. I got pretty upset and probably cried but I remember thinking that this one kid took them. 

This kid was known for causing trouble and stealing stuff so I instinctively thought he took them. I started yelling at him asking where my cards were until the teacher got involved.

 She sent us both to the vice principal. Since this kid had a poor reputation already the vice principal figured that the kid did take my cards and told him to give them back.

 He claimed he didn’t and eventually the vice principal made him write an apology letter to me and I never talked to the kid again. A few years pass and my mom is cleaning out my closet with me and she finds one of my old jackets. I decided to try it on and see if it fit when I noticed something in the side pocket. Yeah, it was my Pokémon cards and well I hid them so my mom couldn’t see.

 I remember feeling super embarrassed just thinking that I wrongfully accused some kid of taking my pokémon cards and making him write an apology letter. 15 years later and now I check my pockets pretty much every time I leave a room just so I don’t have to ever deal with that kinda feeling again.

Hunt321

My girlfriend is an arachnophobe and would refuse to go upstairs to go to bed because there was a 'gigantic' spider near the stairs (it was pretty big). I tried to catch it but it escaped and hid. She was prepared to sleep in the car because she was terrified and wouldn't come back inside the house until I killed the spider.

 I sat there for an hour waiting for it to come back out but it didn't. 

I was very tired and just wanted to go to bed so I then photoshopped a dead spider on a fly swatter and showed it to her saying I killed and threw it out when in fact I never did.

To this day the spider is probably still chilling there living his best life. I'm defo taking this one to the grave. Glad my Photoshop skills came in handy.

MY_name_is_Jeff_21

My ex-wife and I were moving and had saved an antique picture frame containing a painting of her great great great grandfather from the late 1700s to move last by itself due to concern of breakage. I was taking the last load and discovered a frozen turkey that we had forgotten in the freezer so I tossed it on the passenger seat. I had already placed the picture frame on the passenger floorboard. 

As luck would have it, I had to stop quickly and the turkey shot forward, falling into the passenger footwell, and smashing the antique glass. I stopped at a glass shop that was on my route to the new place and had them cut a piece of "antique" glass that looked identical to the old, wavy glass that had been in the frame.

My Ex-wife never questioned it and I never told her and never will.

Dr_strangerloveGA

My ex gf comes from a traumatic family and never wants to be like her alcoholic, home-wrecking mom. But she would spend time at the club with her friends partying till 4 a.m. when she said she'd be home at 6 p.m. 

She ended up crashing her car that night after I had stayed up all night worried about her. She was fine, the car was totaled. Was drunk after I asked if she was okay to drive. She was in every way just like her mom.

Even when I told her we were breaking up, I gave everything but never had it reciprocated even in the slightest. I still told her I was proud of her, for what she's accomplished. 

Deep down, I'm not. It's so hard to be. I supported her in every way I knew how but it was like working all day to pay someone else for giving me the work. 

The net gain was just a pure loss. I had given her every opportunity to improve and thrive. But all I got was being cheated on and used. I'm happy I'm out of there. But I truly hope that my saying I was proud helped her heal even a little bit more so she could thrive and be better. 

TL: DR, I told my ex I am proud of her. I'm not. But I hope she finds happiness.

Chairswithwheels 

I had hooked up with my wife's close friend before I dated my wife. I remember when telling her about the hookup she specifically said "Well, at least you didn't go to her apartment" and I realized later that she meant at least you didn't sleep with someone else.

We did sleep with each other, just in her car, not her apartment. I thought it was obvious by my calling it a 'hookup' that we had slept but not. 

There was never really a time to tell her. They haven't been friends for years and years. And now it has been well over 20 years and it seems like such a small silly thing to even bring up if I ever were to bring it up.

frogvscrab

Last night there was a mosquito in me and my girlfriend's room. She was using her phone and it kept flying in her face so she told me to kill it.

After a couple of minutes of looking around for it I finally spotted it, at that point she asked me to grab her charger immediately because her phone was almost dead. 

I grabbed it, then looked back to where the mosquito was before to no avail.

I just pretended to smack it with a pair of jeans and said "yep gottem"

Singular_Crowbar

I snooped on her computer one day while she was in the shower and found discord messages of her and a mutual colleague texting. She was telling him how she wanted him inside her again. I didn’t confront her about it right then and there because we were studying for a test the following day. 

Since that day I’ve snooped on her computer and found out that 2-3 of our other close friends know about her flings/relationship with the mutual colleague.

I’ve tried breaking up with her before but for some reason, 

I can’t seem to just tell her that I know about the cheating. 

We also went to a party a couple of weeks back and she said that another one of our mutual colleagues “pushed up on me” I confronted him a couple of days later and he said that she kissed him and seemed into it, he then messaged her apologizing and she immediately called me mad as hell asking me why I talked to him and that she felt uncomfortable. 

I know about the cheating, I just can’t seem to break up with her.

Clarkkentlookalike 

I have a scary ghost story I keep to myself. Work sent me to Colorado and it was my first time driving in the mountains and boy were they spooky. I splurged and stayed at the Shining Hotel so I'm already on edge. I turned a corner and in the middle of the road was a ghost. 

He must have died on a bicycle because he was dressed in one of their beautiful outfits. I gunned it and expected him to turn to mist but I was too scared so I closed my eyes.

I heard a loud thump and some ghostly wails but they were gone. Here is where it gets super spooky. Once I got back to the hotel I noticed a dent and bright red ghost juice! 

I ended up telling insurance I hit a deer like anyone would believe I hit a ghost. Thank freak they didn't check blood for weed. It was my first time being in a recreational state.

Too scary of a story and I'm afraid they'll make fun of me for having a ghost story 😅

Spookyandcrazy

Where to start...

I hate his dad for blowing his brains out and breaking the love of my life 3 months into our relationship. I hate all of his family for a plethora of justifiable reasons, but this isn't that post.

He's the love of my life; gravity was never as real as our love holding me down to this planet. 

The reason I'm up, the reason I go so freaking hard and do all of the drugs, the reason I am a freaking wreck, is because I know more than I've ever known anything (aside from the fact that we were once the same magic molecule of space glitter that got separated and reunited, that I can't remember a single memory I've ever had that he wasn't there for, my entire freaking life, since the moment I met him, and my whole freaking existence made sense). 

I won't be with him again unless he is ever getting therapy and grief counseling, which is something he'll never do so everything's pretty much set in stone by now.

Oh, and I am not going to be too broken up when his mom dies so he'll finally let me love him and him love me without him being manipulated into feeling guilty for not being her emotional incest husband. 

I know I haven't painted things in the best light.  But this man is the most beautiful, afraid, determined, ferocious, thoughtful, passionate, desperate, lost, wondrous soul. It means a lot to love him. And I can. And I do. But for now, I'm gonna do my thing while he does his. 

I'm okay, okay whether we're ever together again or not because I know he'll always need me. Also, I love my single life and I love my challenging life with him so it's a win-win lol

Smellexisb 

Not mine. But I failed). When my grandmother passed away a few years ago we were going through her stuff and came across something weird. It was her wedding certificate but it had the wrong year on it. 

My mom was super confused and all her siblings were equally confused. Everyone was sure about the year. There was a newspaper clipping of the wedding that someone had but the date at the top was ripped off.

 Someone else had pictures and had written that dates the back that matched the year that everyone was sure about. It was like an hour later that my mom suddenly realized her oldest sibling was born that year. 

He was born “out of wedlock”. Not only my grandmother but grandpa, all my great aunts, and uncles, and even anyone alive for that wedding (all deceased at this point) were all in on this huge conspiracy. The old nearly got away with it but forgot about that one pesky clue.

Kawwaymog

My girlfriend's family often talked about her deceased maternal grandfather in a positive light, often. From the stories they've all shared I get the impression her grandfather was angry and I'm glad I won't be meeting him. 

He was a veteran of both Korea and Vietnam and saw a lot of fighting during his years of service. They talk about him pounding down bottles of Crown Royal high school graduations and telling the kids mess like, "Now you're an adult you can no longer get away with being useless". 

On family weekend vacations the moment any of his children acted out of line he'd force the published kid to sit in the car the whole weekend without participating in any of the activities. Beatings were frequent and crying only justified harsher penalties. 

They laugh about it "Oh my pop would beat me to the point I couldn't sit for a week!  Hahahaha" He was an abusive drunk.

Atrosity_Unknown

I don't know if i’lI’ller truly be happy with him ever again. 

I guess consistently catching him browsing through pictures of undressed girls, and thirst traps was enough to ingrain into me that he truly doesn’t like/want me or sees me as the prettiest girl in the world.

 I always feel like I'm competing, and I look bashing like what he jacks off to. I've brought it up every time I've found it, and despite all of the emotional talks we’ve had.. . still didn’t help.

 The last time I caught him was a week after both of my grandparents passed away literally back to back. I was in hell, grieving and depressed, went through his tikTikToktch history, and found exactly what I wanted to find. 

He had an entire account of girls with massive looks who were just shaking and dancing, it was obvious why he was watching. Do you know what was even worse? It was dated the same day as Grandma’s calling hours (which he went to). 

I was mortified. 

He has put in a lot of effort to stop his addiction, deleted a lot of social media that helped contribute to his problem and has gone out of his way to show me that something was going on. 

It seems like he is trying his best to prevent himself from lapsing. He knows that I’ve lapsed from that incident, and the few other times since then. He cried for hours after he found out, hating himself for being the cause. 

I thought it might be too late. He's broken my trust numerous times, it is tremendously difficult to believe him anymore. It feels like this was the first time he had decided to put in any real effort… when I'm mostly checked out from this relationship after experiencing the same heartbreak multiple times. I believe that I am going to be this way forever, no matter who I am with in the future. 

I need therapy, I need someone to talk to about this. I don't know how to heal, or if there's even an option for me anymore. It's so expensive, and I don't make enough money to even cover the cost of some necessities. 

I've dug myself into a deep hole, struggling internally with body image, and weight gain, and am now developing an eating disorder. I want a break from this life lol.

Insamiti

My wife is horrified by cockroaches. We have 2 bathrooms and I primarily use the smaller bathroom to do my business. 

There is a specific cockroach that comes out so-so often a very small hole behind the sink and I have tried to squish it, but It always gets away. 

This thing is massive and probably the biggest cockroach I have ever seen.

Since I have not managed to squish it due to its size, I have named it Titan. 

If my wife ever finds out, she will probably not sleep until it's dead.

Hansomsquidward 

My girlfriend means more to her than I probably ever will. She always talks about if how anything ever happens to her cat besides the inevitable old age, she will kill herself and everyone around her (obviously not really, but it would be a big deal). Well we, had been living together for about a year when she went out of town for three days and it was pretty much my first time having the house to myself since we started living together. 

One night, I decided to treat myself to a homemade steak dinner. If anybody knows anything about searing steak on a super hot cast iron pan with lots of butter, it’s impossible to avoid a smoky house,  I opened the back door which was in eyesight of the kitchen so I would have been able to stop the cat if he even tried going outside. 

Well, I was not wearing a shirt while cooking my steak, and when I went to flip it with my tongs, it slipped out and went kersplat on the pan filled with sizzling butter and fat which went spraying all over my stomach. (Almost a year later and I still have scars) .

Naturally, I was no longer paying attention to the back door and only worried about my scalding stomach.

 I eventually finished my steak and went to bed for the night. 

When I woke up I went to feed the cat in the morning and could not find it anywhere. I was freaking out. I put up flyers on all my neighbors. I walked around the neighborhood for two days jiggling food bowls and squeaky toys. 

On the day my girlfriend was coming home, I woke up to meowing on my back porch, I ran to open the door and it came walking in like nothing ever happened. I fed it, combed off the dirt I could find, and when my girlfriend got home two hours later, I acted like he was never gone.

Killermike420

I never told my former partner (long-distance relationship) how much of a burden it felt for me to interact and do things with her. I put in such a great deal of effort, but honestly, it, was so psychologically exhausting for me and I felt like if I took a break from all of it, I'd try pushing her away. Now just friends, I'm doing just that - pushing her away because 

I don't have that same drive to make things work like I used to and I don't believe her when she says she wants to work on improving our friendship before getting together again. 

I'm on the autistic spectrum and she already knows that. So I should have been honest about my feelings, but I was afraid she'd think she was too much of a burden and leave me over it, when really despite the hardships I loved her enough to push through it and persevere. 

That's the only secret I can think of that I kept from her. I was 99.99% transparent on everything with her - even my deepest secrets - but it was my transparency that also caused us to break up when I told her I had a very light crush on someone else.

Roudan

I nearly set our car on fire.

I topped off the oil before a work trip. An hour down the highway, smoke was pouring from the engine compartment. I pulled over and very carefully popped the hood, and smoke and flames were coming from the exhaust manifold behind the engine. I hadn't put the cap back on the oil reservoir. Oil was spitting everywhere.

Somehow, incredibly, the oil cap wasn't lost forever. It had fallen and lodged against the battery bracket.

 I put it back, sat for 30 minutes with the hood open while the engine cooled, wiped down everything as best I could, and carried on. I got the engine and oil system checked out later, and they were fine.

I'm not usually forgetful or careless. I still can't believe I did this. It'll be cataloged in my library of shame till the end of my days. I always told my wife everything, but this one thing I just couldn't. And in case she smelled something while driving, I told her it was spilled oil.

Supernoven

Before my fiancé was my fiancé we had an international trip planned. I was out of state for work the week before we were flying overseas. I won’t go into the details of what happened but the day before our flight he was on strong medication and slept all day unexpectedly. 

I arrived home 12 hours before our flight and he was asleep and in no state to be woken up or to pack and I was still unsure whether we’d even be making the flight. 

His suitcase was out on the dining table so I checked to see if I needed to finish packing for him. Luckily, he’d been super organized and had already packed before the incident except for his toiletries. While checking his suitcase, I found an engagement ring. I was completely surprised, gasped, and put it straight back.

Fortunately a couple of hours before we had to leave for the airport, he woke up and had made a full recovery. We went on our trip as planned and got engaged after his romantic proposal.

Aromatichydrocarbons 

He already knows my deepest darkest secret - that I lied about going to college for a few years. My mom wouldn’t help me financially unless I was in school (I was working but it had to be school too). 

I had undiagnosed ADHD and let a deadline slip by for registration and was too scared to admit I had to skip a semester since I couldn’t afford to live on my retail wages. 

But once I skipped one semester the paperwork was freaked out for the next year and eventually it was 2 years later and I never got it sorted. 

I wound up making a fake degree and pretending I couldn’t get time off to attend graduation.  Pretty much everyone believes I decided teaching wasn’t for me to cover up my actual getting back in school and finally my degree.

Priteegrl

My wife is as close to a real-life angel as I've ever met, since my great-grandmother. So loving, kind, and generous. She's also a fantastic mother... 

But she's been a pretty neglectful wife since we started having kids. We have two, the youngest just turned 1. I've never felt less desired. We've talked about it many times, and I've tried a few methods to open things up. 

Through my attempts, I've learned that her love language/requirements include basic things like frequent hugs, kisses, words of affirmation, cuddles, and back rubs. Among a few other things. I feel like I do these things often and to the absolute best of my ability. 

The only recent times I've seen the spark in her eyes is when we're talking/planning the next vacation or party, which always includes her mother (stepdad and sister). 

We've gone on dates without the kids, but when dinner is over and I attempt to romance and/or make things spicy, I get turned down because "we need to get back to the kids".

I know she's often exhausted because of the minimal sleep, and caring for our children. But she's always got energy to spare for the next party we attend/host. A couple of weeks ago we were out till midnight for a friend's birthday party. She has never stayed up for me/us till midnight.

I can never allow her to know how truly unsatisfied I am with our intimacy, because I cannot handle seeing her unhappy. I would not want to live if I knew she felt anything remotely like I feel. She's got some ideas because of all of our conversations,  but she doesn't know the depth. Not even close. The talks we've had always left me feeling guilty regret for making her feel like she was not enough. I will never leave/cheat. I am going to keep it to myself because I love my family. That's it.

Oxmrjxo

My SO is an alcoholic, but functioning. When sober, she is the most amazing person I've ever met, bar none. No one has ever even come close.

So I utilize specific places on Reddit to journal and redirect my frustrations and anger. Sometimes it's pretty bad and mean enough that I come back and usually delete it a day or so later. 

If she were to find them, not only would our relationship immediately be over, but it would probably permanently damage her mental health.

But it's kept the good times good so far, and allows me to approach the bad times with solutions and a level head, instead of coming at her sideways after we've both worked all day and I've had a full 9 hours to marinate in my frustrations.

cthulucore

I love him deeply, but I'm pissed he chooses to do a lowerish paying job. 

When we first got together, we both had aspirations, and he had big dreams for what he wanted to do. He never did it, I offered for him to go through more school, and I would support us and lots of other things. His excuse was that his English wasn't too good but it was. His English was perfect. 

He just got comfortable or lied to me or something. When we got married, we both agreed, that when we had children I would be a sham when the time came and then when they were in school, I would work part-time. 

We can't do that and need my full-time income. 

I'm set to go back to work again next month, and every day, I just ... am just so disappointed with his lack of motivation and being okay to live with lower pay lower-playing. This isn't what we agreed to and not what I expected. I'll see my kids for 3 hours a day before they go to bed. That's it. 3 freaking hours a day. 

But when I wanted to go back to school (and I still would) he said no. It's like he wants us to fail.

Ohheywhatehoh

My stepdad stole a lot of my underwear growing up. I told my dad that and other things about what was happening and no one removed me from the home. No one believed me. But my brother was allowed to leave and he didn’t have anything happen to him.

I haven’t lived in the same state or country for a decade (and counting).

I continue to maintain the image that the relationship is fine because his parents made my childhood more bearable. I can’t bring myself to talk about it. Only one of my siblings believed me. I just wish people didn’t brush it off back then.

No_spinach6508

Not an SO, but in college, my best friend (m) asked me (f) to move in with him after both our roommates transferred schools and left us in a lurch. 

Before all that, when we first met, he tried to date me but I friendzoned him. By the time we moved in together, I knew I was in love with him, but he had a girlfriend so I befriended her to make sure she understood I’d never make a move on her man (and I didn’t). I was really into post secret at the time, so one night when I was really in my feels after attending a concert with both of them and having to see them together, I went into a bathroom stall at the venue and scribbled “I am in love with (his initials) and I’m too scared to tell him” just to get it off my chest.

 I purposely wrote in a different handwriting just to be safe, though who would ever even see it considering there were scribbles and names all over the stall? Fast forward two years, he and his girlfriend had broken up and he and I were at this venue together still just friends. 

He came out of the bathroom and said he wanted to show me something, led me to the stall, and pointed to what I wrote. He kind of laughed, made a joke about it being written for him,m and said, “But seriously though, if anyone ever loved me like that, I’d marry them.”

I never fessed up, and 15 years later, we have still never dated. We both find ourselves single again in our mid-30s though, so who knows.

Fashionablypeyt 

Not my spouse, but my brothers. She and I were close for the first few years of their dating but when they got married something changed.

The conversations I had with her have gone from loving/sisterly to just downright insulting. She makes me feel small when I chat with her, and as a 25-year-old woman, it’s pretty infuriating. 

One example: a few months back I decided it was time for me to go back to college. I told her about my desire to go back and her response was “idk, you seem to drop out every time you go back”. Pretty motivating coming from a teacher….

For my sake, I’ll just say, that I have only dropped 2 classes ever and during 2020 I decided to not sign up for the fall semester (respectfully that was a tough year). Her response motivated me to do well, and I did. 

I only took 3 classes because I was moving halfway across the country at the time (which was a nightmare), and working full-time, but I passed all of them with A’s! 

I see no point in snapping back at her for the things she says. Not only will that cause unnecessary drama, but I genuinely feel good knowing that I can do well despite what she thinks. To hell sister-in-law.

Mediocreorchid6382

My spouse has developed an addiction over the last 5 years. Two weeks ago was the third time I have found out they were using again after “quitting” and insisting they could stop on their own. 

They have lied, stolen, cheated, and disappeared for three weeks straight before getting arrested. This time they decided they couldn’t do it on their own and went into a detox and are currently in a rehabilitation facility for at least 25 more days.

Despite this, I think I’m done. Yes, they chose to do this on their own and admitted they needed it. I’m being incredibly supportive right now because they need it and I want to see them better.

 I just feel completely drained. I’m so tired and frustrated of having to hold it together because they can’t. I’m not going to kick them out, divorce them after 18 years, or even let the truth show.

Simply, I’ve resigned myself to just accepting the rest of my life will be supporting my family like I always have and pretending that I’m not just entirely over the relationship and empty inside. I’m almost 40 and as long as this is the last time I’ll just go along with a smile for the rest of my life.

They will never know, and as long as I can continue to protect my children it will stay that way.

zer0boy

Our first Christmas together he got me an overcoat that I had fallen in love with but thought was too expensive. He is so proud of how he managed to buy it while out with me and managing to keep it a secret, and he always has the biggest grin when he talks about it...

Truth is, I realized he wasn't around while in the shop, had a hunch, and went to check on the coat and found it missing (TK Maxx, only one coat) - then went downstairs and saw him come from the till with a big bag and a smug face.

He always looks so proud of himself for surprising me and getting such a good present, I can't burst his bubble.

hellyeshomo 

I replaced the engagement ring he got me. We had talked about marriage for a while and he kept getting hung up on saving up for a ring. 

I was serious when I told him I didn't care what ring he proposed with and that I just wanted to be married to him.

The ring he got though, was just too big and costume jewelry to wear every day though.

 I bought a new ring with the same design but a real and slightly smaller stone. 

We've been happily married for years, I still wear my beautiful ring almost every day and I'm pretty sure he still has no idea. Why should our happiness hinge on him spending thousands of dollars when jewelry is only important to me and not to him?

NoMeGustaTrabajo

I'm more stressed and depressed than I let on, been together for nearly 5 years, and I have cried once in front of her over that time, and it was out of pure mental and physical exhaustion.

I'm a regional manager of a restaurant chain and I oversee 5 stores, I had just finished a 60+ hour week at work, eager to have a few days off when they asked me to come in on my off days when another manager unfortunately had his appendix explode (sucks I know). So I needed to work again. 

She had woken up early before me and ironed my clothes, had breakfast ready for me and when I saw this, I just broke down because I'd never thought I was worthy of this love. Still don't.  

Still at this point don't know what will be said in my head every day whether I'll get mentally better or not but I know she is someone I can trust.

I'll never tell her the extent of my depression I'm in because it's something she doesn't need on her plate. She has enough as it is.

Droidd1

About 5 years before we started dating, I slept with her mother. She was very feely, caring, fun, and had cool styling. Then we decided to end our short 'and sweet relationship due to the age difference and feelings started to form.

I didn't know she was a young mom at the time (mom +11y, daughter -7). I Met her daughter outside once (didn't know it was her daughter ofc), really cool person into cars and stuff. Down to the ground and after a few nights out, her mom joined us to meet me. 

She had the saddest face ever. I was so anxious I almost got diarrhea right there. Then Mom said, "Aaa, we met at a concert, he's a cool dude, you made a good choice". I broke up with that amazing girlfriend a few months later because I sort of had feelings for her and her mom.  And she'll never know about the mom thing.

 We'll take it to the grave. I've moved on since and am sad at night about the whole situation. Such is life. Maybe not as awesome as other stories here, but there you go.

Sh0dan_v3

When we were dating my wife got tickets to see her favorite band and back then I was also “interested” in this band. The band was playing on the opposite side of the state so we had this whole weekend planned. 

We got everything packed up and I was in charge of making lunch. I made BLTs. We stopped halfway through to eat lunch at a truck stop. When I discovered it, I left the sandwiches on the counter at home. In a panic, I ran into the store and looked for something to buy that looked sorta handmade. 

The only thing they had was egg salad. My wife had no idea what I made anyway why would she question it? Thankfully she takes forever to use the bathroom because I made it back with enough time to clean my tracks and she came back and we ate, did a little stretching, packed up, and left. 

We got up there with no problems yet. She’s feeling pretty hungry again so we decided to eat early dinner and go out to Red Robin. Nothing unusual or exciting happened, we sat down, we ate, we paid the bill, and we went back to the hotel. 

It’s at the hotel though that everything went wrong. We lost our keys. We got to the elevator and right before the doors closed I could see in her eyes, that the egg salad just declared war. 

Over the next 5 minutes, she proceeded to fill the floor of the carpeted elevator with the semi-digested remains of what was once a burger and fries out of her mouth. At that moment the trip had ended and we packed up and went right back home where we both continued to puke for the next few days.

I know what I did, I’m ashamed of what I did, but she’ll never know.

Own_error4828