[COMMENTARY] Twitter Responds to Branson’s Space Flight

Let’s hear it for the hubris of rich men.

Billionaires unconcerned about the starving and the struggling are finding new ways to perhaps escape this planet in the hopes of creating a Shangri-La for themselves in the skies. Elon Musk, Jeff Bezos, and Sir Richard Branson are all determined to be the first to colonize space, although the reality of that is far from the fantasy of these erstwhile Masters of the Universe lounging around smoking cigars while enjoying the endless view from the bar in their exclusive space clubhouse or whatever.


The reality, of course, is that life in space is incredibly difficult. For the handful of astronauts on the Internation Space Station, the simple task of going to the bathroom is a twenty-step process that involves a lot of dexterity, balance, and patience. Every person on the ISS is carefully monitored by a full staff on the ground at NASA, and even the smallest problems take hours to fix. Those time-lapse spacewalk videos that people love to watch? A typical spacewalk takes meticulous planning and can last up to eighteen tedious hours to complete, with the astronauts making repetitive movements so small and precise, their hands are aching and cramping by the end.

Plus, have any of these billionaires seen any movies set in space? NOTHING GOOD EVER HAPPENS IN SPACE. Just watch “Prometheus” and the other movies in the “Alien” universe. Then there’s “Gravity”. Did you not see George Clooney just float away into oblivion? Maybe screen “Event Horizon”, weirdos. Space can kill you in so many different ways, just like the ocean. We are not meant to live in those realms, and nature will always beat back humanity. LEARN FROM NOOMI RAPACE, Sir Richard!

While not everyone was critical because space stuff is cool, Twitter certainly had no problem calling Branson out for his clear ignorance of the Earthly issues he’s ignoring. What if he took those billions for his special space plane and did important things?

So if Elon Musk, Jeff Bezos, and Richard Branson think they’re bringing their entire families to live in space mansions, that’s just not happening. There are reasons humans were born to live on land, not in space or in the ocean. Pushing the limits of human endurance might make you feel all big and macho, but it looks like overcompensation and sad to the rest of us mere mortals who are coming out of the worst 18 months of our lives, not to mention it’s also completely selfish.

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