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[COMMENTARY] Ted Nugent: Walking Superspreader Event

[COMMENTARY] Ted Nugent: Walking Superspreader Event

There are a lot of things one can say about Ted Nugent: that he infamously soiled himself on purpose and then smeared himself with the results so he wouldn’t have to serve in Vietnam; he allegedly received oral sex from a then-12-year-old Courtney Love; he threatened to assassinate Barack Obama and never suffered a single consequence; he’s written a song that’s essentially a love letter to statutory rape called “Jailbait”; he’s a remorseless survivalist who basically lives in a deer stand in the Michigan woods. And he’s a devoted Trump supporter, hitting all of the MAGA descriptors such as denying climate change and being a blatant racist and homophobe, all that fun stuff.

But karma just paid the “Motor City Madman” (psst Ted, Detroit doesn’t want to know you, but the “Madman” part can stay) a nice little visit where she bestowed upon him a whopping case of the virus he dismissed as a “hoax” because the former guy told him to. Queen Karma scared the Nuge so badly, he thought he was dying. All of Twitter enjoyed a giant slab of schadenfreude for a while and then moved on, because no one was upset and no one really cared.


But wait, there’s more now. It turns out Typhoid Ted wasn’t hiding in his deer stand while asymptomatic, he was traveling around with a whole bunch of people on a private plane, and of course, nobody was wearing masks. Not only was Nugent spreading a disease that wasn’t venereal for a change, one of those people is MAGA Mean Girl and useless Governor of South Dakota Kristi Noem, who let the former guy hold maskless events in her state to curry favor.

Nugent’s unfortunate wife Shemane posted a photo of them standing with Noem and Republican donor Greg Mosing (yes, he’s a dead ringer for Mike Pompeo, we all see it) and his wife, Donna, in front of the private plane, which she captioned “Thank you for a great trip with Governor Kristi Noem, on Rockstar One (think Air Force One!)”

Why are all of these people next-level delusional? Five bucks says none of them are quarantining right now.

According to reports and flight logs, Nugent zigzagged across the country while experiencing symptoms from what turned out to be the Rona. How many people did he infect all by himself? Flight logs show the plane, which may belong to Not-Mike-Pompeo-Mosing up there, took off that same day from Naples, Florida, where Nugent had live-streamed his visit to the Seed to Table restaurant whose owner vocally opposes mask ordinances and refused to enforce his county’s order.

BECAUSE FLORIDA. Nugent has probably caused a chain-reaction superspreader event all by his disgusting self. You can also worry about South Dakota having yet another Sturgis-like outbreak thanks to Not-Quarantining-Noem. KKKristi is tweeting like she just wasn’t hanging out with a Superspreader sexual predator just a few days ago and she was getting rightfully ratioed for it and her other clueless COVID tweets on Twitter Wednesday afternoon.


Karma will be back for you, KKKristi. She just needs some time to rest up after doing the Wango Tango with Typhoid Ted.

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