[COMMENTARY] QAnons Awaiting Return of JFK Jr in Dallas Now Think He’s Opening for the Rolling Stones

Yes, you read that headline correctly, but I’ll give you a minute to read it again and shake your head before you move on.

Has everything stopped spinning in your brain yet? Good, then let’s continue.

As we’ve covered before, the members of the QAnon cult of conspiracy theorists are happy to believe absolutely anything and everything, except for the actual truth about the world around them. The MAGA crossover group has decided that math and science aren’t real, but a worldwide cabal of Lizard People posing as Democrats using pizza delivery men to sex traffic infants so they can drink their blood is perfectly legit.

Oh, and also John F. Kennedy, Jr. is not only still alive, they say, but he’s about to come back so he can run for Vice President along with Donald Trump in 2024. He’s just been “hiding out” in Pennsylvania using the name Vincent Fusco, who’s been spotted at several QAnon rallies and is treated like a demi-god instead of a guy who looks like a third-rate John Lennon impersonator who busks at the weekly farmer’s market in the park.

Uncanny, isn’t it? 🤦‍♀️

It's now past 12:29. At 12:29, the crowd recited the Pledge if Allegiance. No JFK Jr. yet. pic.twitter.com/CskJ5oAxNE

— steven monacelli (@stevanzetti) November 2, 2021

The QAnon believers began gathering in Dealey Plaza in Dallas on Monday evening. People on the scene said that they expected the former president’s dead son to reveal himself Tuesday at 12:29 p.m. to reinstate Donald J. Trump as president. What they don’t seem to get is that Godot will show up before John-John. Or Bigfoot carrying Elvis piggyback while Jim Morrison tags along.

QAnon people in Dallas who have been waiting all morning for JFK Jr. to make his miraculous appearance are calling local reporters “Fake News.” pic.twitter.com/mjRZAUbblU

— Ron Filipkowski (@RonFilipkowski) November 2, 2021

Instead of deciding to live back here on Earth One when JFK Jr didn’t show at the predicted time, the QAnons just moved the goalposts yet again. The word quickly spread that his reemergence would take place at a Rolling Stones concert in Dallas later in the evening. Because if there’s one thing Mick and Keith love, it’s letting other people upstage them or use their band to promote their own qrazy agenda.

The QAnon people are walking up to random people they think are dead celebrities in Dallas today and introducing themselves. So far they have seen "Robin Williams" and "Dale Earnhardt."

They now think JFK Jr. will reveal himself at a Rolling Stones concert tonight. pic.twitter.com/oyu7YkRgBk

— Ben Collins (@oneunderscore__) November 2, 2021

One QAnon believer explained on a live stream that many dead celebrities were expected to turn up on Tuesday, “convinced” that Mick Jagger would bring JFK Jr. on stage. Spoiler for those in the area who might have tickets or might be considering scalping just in case this might happen…big NAH.

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The best about these JFK livestreams is when one nutter calls another nutter a nutter.

"I believe JFK is opening for the Rolling Stones tonight"

In the chat: "What a moron, JFK was obviously killed by Hillary"

— Amarnath Amarasingam (@AmarAmarasingam) November 2, 2021

JFK Jr. and the other dead celebrities failed to show in Dallas. But the QAnon crew has moved on, and now believes they'll make an appearance at the Dallas Rolling Stones concert tonight. "Rolling Stones? Rolling away the stone!" says one.

— Will Sommer (@willsommer) November 2, 2021

And when JFK Jr. doesn’t materialize to open for the Stones tonight, the QAnons will move the goalposts somewhere else nowhere near the actual truth.